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An Accurate And Honest Summary Of "Vivah"

A beautiful tale of how a benevolently sexist dad sneakily gets away with never giving a shit about his other lovely darker-skinned daughter.

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Meet Krishnakant, local kanyadaan connoisseur, racist, and adoptive father of his deceased brother's daughter Poonam.

Rajshri / Imaan Sheikh

He loves her very much and literally just looking at her makes him cry because she's so beautiful and adorable and laughs at everything like a fucking oaf.

Minor detail: He also also has a blood-daughter called Rajni. She doesn't really matter to Krishnakant because she's dark-skinned. Rajni's mom wants to lighten TF out of her skin, and she hates Poonam.

And Prem creepily takes low-res photos of Poonam without asking. #awwww

Rajshri / Imaan Sheikh

First of all, Prem, that's a bitchass VGA camera 'cause it's 2006.

Second of all, WOW WHAT A WELL-LIT SETTING, U FUCKIN GENIUS.

By this point in the movie I'm beginning to realise I need English subtitles for this shit because I assumed the film is in Hindi but this is straight-up Sanskrit.

And this creepy fucker does the weird photo in the dark thing, obviously.

Rajshri / Imaan Sheikh

I will not even TOUCH on the song "Mujhe Haq Hai" which is where this GIF is from. Just no. Nope. Not today.

Poonam's adoptive mom is kinda done with this shit because her husband doesn't even TALK to Rajni. Like, this isn't a deliberate part of the movie, he just GENUINELY gives no fucks. I've literally NEVER seen dad even talk to Rajni wtf.

The night before the wedding, a fire breaks out in Poonam's house, and of course her incompetent AF relatives handle it perfectly.

Even when the house is on fire, Daddy Krishankant continues to solely care about Poonam. Let me remind you that Rajni is an absolute sweetheart to everyone anyway, but who cares. Poonam is prettier.

He hasn't run out of fucks to give about Rajni, he gave none to begin with. He went inside, rescued Poonam, and picked up the fucking WEDDING DRESS INSTEAD OF HIS LIVING BREATHING LOVELY DAUGHTER.

Literally the fucking doctor who has nothing to do with this is praising the shit out of Prem for being a decent human being, and telling him he's making it hard for himself.

The couple gets formally married a month later. Prem's family has a brain and has thus accepted Poonam without reservations. Dad is glad her face is "still pretty".

Moral of the story:

Call out your racist, benevolently sexist dad.

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