ilostmyphoneonce

The men I work with are constantly asking me questions that the customer asked them. They’re good at what they do too but I retain so much information because I’m obsessed lol

Honestly please just tip 20 percent. I can put up with so much nonsense if you take care of me. No one likes to work for free.

Order all your drinks at once!! This includes waters. I can bang out 5 long islands in 15 seconds but if you order them one at a time it’s going to take up to 5 minutes. And then I’m going to hate you.

So many!! But mostly Taystee and Poussey from Orange Is the New Black. They’re always having fun but they still challenge each other.

Whoa whoa whoa. I LOVE being fingered. Sometimes it’s the only way I can cum. #20 is wrong.

Padme survives and raises her children and tells them the damn truth for once. Also she fixes the political system and tells Anakin he’s being whiney.

I was working the door at this bar once when a woman came in saying she had left her phone there the night before. We didn’t have any phones turned in but she said “Find my iPhone” was giving her an address 20 minutes away. She said she had been taken out of our establishment at 3am… Read More

Tell everyone! Some will try to convince you it’s a bad idea, sure. But then you know who not to hang out with. Most people will support you and hold you accountable. I give up drinking for Lent every year and I’ve found this helps the most.

There is a vegan chain called Native Foods Cafe that I love so much and would really like to see in the south and on the east coast. We’re talking vegan versions of junk food favorites like nachos and wings, plus handcrafted bowls with kale and quinoa. Their ranch is so good, people… Read More