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1. A sweater perfect for articulating your absolute love of fermented grapes.
2. An elf sweater showing you just how much you'll be drinking at the holiday party.
3. A Rick and Morty sweater that'll be way better than standing on line for some heavenly Szechuan sauce.
4. A retro Reptar sweater that'll kind of make you wanna see his glorious romance on ice.
5. A Mike Tyson sweater because why not don yourself with a champ?
6. A red sweater to let everyone know who exactly the party pooper is, and it isn't you.
7. A Pickachu sweater so you can have the cutest Pokèmon on you at all times.
8. A sloth sweater, because they're fucking adorable and love life just like you.
9. A Vladimir Putin-inspired Santa sweater that'll maybe convince the leader of Russia to splash vodka in your face, but at least the cheers of adoration were worth it!
10. A BB-8 sweater so the force will always be with you, even while dealing with crazy relatives.
11. A Destiny's Child-inspired sweater that won't cheat on you even if your man will. Santa won't cheat on you, either.
12. A Darth Vader sweater, because even the leader of the Empire can enjoy holly.
13. A light-up unicorn sweater that'll puke all of the sweet, sweet things you love about the holidays.
14. A Legend of Zelda sweater because Link is just that guy and the color green looks good on you.
15. A cute kitten sweater that'll really get you to understand the true meaning of the holidays.
16. An angry cat sweater with the cutest Santa hat you've ever seen.
17. A grumpy pug sweater that's trying so hard to be mean, but he loves presents just as much as you do.
18. A minimalistic Christmas tree sweater with just the right amount of ornaments.
19. A Super Mario Bros. sweater. Hopefully you'll get some power-ups for Christmas this year.
20. A refreshing Coca Cola sweater you won't have to wrestle with polar bears for to gain some warmth.
21. A simple Santa sweater that'll take "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" to a whole other level.
22. A Bob's Burger's sweater to remind yourself of what the holiday is really about — annoying your siblings.
23. A light-up unicorn sweater that'll get you to use your imagination, especially when it comes to magical creatures.
24. An off-shoulder sweater to be just as cozy as it is funny.
25. A golfing Santa sweater so you can show everyone what he was doing instead of delivering gifts this year.
26. A cute-ass fleece navidad sweater that'll be fuzzier than an actual sheep.
27. A space invaders sweater so you can defeat all of the aliens wanting to take over planet earth.
28. A singing sheep sweater to give you the courage to belt out all the holiday songs you know at the top of your head.
29. A Black Panther sweater so you can fly right by Christmas and get straight to Kwanzaa.
30. An ominous sweater. It should probably be at the beginning of every horror movie.
31. A light-up Stranger Things sweater so you can send personalized messages from the upside down.
32. A black sweater with St. Nick himself sitting on a throne of candy canes because he is the one true king of the North (Pole).
33. A sweater and necklace set because if you can't see your name in lights, why not be a human Christmas tree?
34. An alien sweater, because even extraterrestrials love getting presents and eating candy canes. They travelled so far.
35. A chimney sweater in a truly regal blue, only bested by the fact that Santa Claus is stuck in the chimney with his pants down.
36. A Ninja Turtles sweater to bring on some nerdy cheer.
37. A fuzzy sweater only perpetually lonely people who want a significant other can wear.
38. A classic Elf sweater, because it's your favorite holiday movie, and it actually makes you laugh out loud.
39. A black sweater that'll show what everyone is at the holiday party for in the first place — free liquor.
40. A Jon Snow sweatshirt that just might bring about a white Christmas. You've got to go home, now.
41. A sweatshirt to show everyone just how loved you are all across the world. Never mind that you have that Ludacris song stuck in your head now.
42. A downright disrespectful pissing Santa sweater that'll light up because even Santa's pee is fucking magic.
43. A gingerbread cookie sweater perfect for getting stoned, eating all the food, and taking a nap afterwards. Isn't that what the holidays are all about, anyway?
I hope your holiday is as lit as DMX singing Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer!
Reviews here have been edited for length and/or clarity.