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Bundle up!

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You will feel better

when your body's just bones.

You'll no longer be troubled

by birthday milestones.

You won't have to wonder

if the pain in your chest

will be the coroner's report

of your eternal rest.

There'll be no more worrying

'bout your hips getting wider.

You'll no longer shriek

at the sight of a spider.

If you cling to your bones,

you might feel lightheaded.

And you'll certainly find that

you're quite dehydrated.

Perhaps you will miss

your collection of shoes,

the variety of snacks,

or selections of booze.

But you'll no longer pay taxes

our fine government collects,

or be bothered by drivers

with substandard intellects.

No more waiting in line

to get the treasures you want.

No more lousy service

at a store or restaurant.

No more over-the-top ballads,

annoying ads,

or "I can't believe

we bought that" fads.

All of these things

will belong to the past,

and you, my dear,

will rest in peace at last.

© 2012 L.E.H.

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