11 Of The Worst Superpowers We Could Imagine

What if you could fly, but only for one foot at a time? Enjoy series five of Misfits on Hulu.

1. Insta-bloat!

For everyone who is tired of feeling not bloated.

2. Above-Average Jumping

Abnormal jumping skills would be amazing, unless they’re only ever-so-slightly above normal.

3. Aging on Command

Anthony Cerniello / Via io9.com

Kind of cool, but unless you can also un-age on command, this is not the most useful ability.

4. Short-Distance Flight

One foot. You can only fly one foot.

5. Weresnail

Every 30 days, when the full moon is high, you feel a tingling in your bones… the wilderness is calling… you must join your snail brethren!

6. Bean-Summoning

Neil Sanders / Via neilsanders.tumblr.com

At will, you can summon all the beans in a 50-foot radius. Big hit at barbecues.

7. Selective Invisibility

More specifically, the ability to be invisible, but only when no one is looking at you.

8. Guzmán Vision

Joe Kohen / Getty Images for The New Yorker

Upon seeing a B- or C-list actor, you can recite his or her entire filmography.

9. Split-Second Time Stop

You can stop time for .5 seconds. Even if you try really hard to keep stopping time in back-to-back intervals, the best you’ll accomplish is a slow strobe effect.

10. Internet Empathy

Anytime someone posts a mean comment on the internet, you are physically hurt by it.

11. Potato Chip Bones

Sorry, bro.

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