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    23 Jokes From "Hot Fuzz" That Humans Will Laugh At For The Next 10,000 Years

    "I was extremely shocked when I looked at my watch and discovered I should be in the pub."

    1. Angel's arrest record.

    The Met Sergeant says, "Your arrest record is 400% higher than any other officer"
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    2. Angel's transfer from London to Sandford, Gloucestershire.

    The Met Sergeant says, "Well you've always wanted to transfer to the country," Angel says, "Hang on, I don't remember telling you that," and the Met Sergeant says, "Yes, you did, you said, 'I'd love to settle down in the country some time, Janine'"
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    3. Janine's perfect work attire.

    Janine and her colleagues are in boiler suits masks, Angel says, "Janine I've been transferred, I'm moving," the person he's talking to says, "I'm not Janine," Angel turns around and says to a new person, "Janine I've been transferred, I'm moving"
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    By the way, Janine is played by Cate Blanchett. LOL.

    4. The new person Janine is seeing.

    Angel says, "Is it Bob," and Janine says, "No, does Bob look like the kind of person I'd go out with, it's Dave,"but Bob and Dave turn around at their names and they're dressed exactly the same
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    5. The fascist and the hag.

    Joyce Cooper says, "Fascist," Angel says, "I beg your pardon," Cooper says, "System of government characterized by extreme dictatorship, 7 across," Angel says, "Oh, fascism," then he says, "Hag, evil old woman considered frightful or ugly, 12 down"
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    It says "swan" on the crossword puzzle, which is a lovely Easter egg for later.

    6. The Sandford police station has a swear box, where curse words are written with symbols, but the c-word is written in full.

    Certain curse words have asterisks, but then it's just the full c-word
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    7. The living statue that Tom Weaver, the leader of the Neighbourhood Watch Alliance, can't stand.

    Tom Weaver says, "Our friend, the living statue, was here Saturday, eleven o'clock, twelve o'clock, one o'clock, two o'clock," as we see pictures of the living statue in the exact same position throughout the day
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    Also, yes, Neighbourhood Watch Alliance is abbreviated to NWA.

    8. Detective Sergeant Andy's moustache.

    Detective Sergeant Andy has a milk moustache over his real one, Angel says, "You've got a moustache," and Detective Sergeant Andy says, "I know"
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    9. When a swan escapes.

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    Angel and Danny proceed to wonderfully chase the swan around.

    10. The way Mr. Blower talks when Angel and Danny pull him over for speeding.

    Mister Blower says, "Well, now, you see, we are staging a homage to William Shakespeare's 'Romeo and Juliet' and I'm a little late for the dress rehearsal"
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    After this scene, we see Danny turned his notebook into a two-sided flip book. It's a great moment that's impossible to screenshot.

    11. The homage to Romeo and Juliet.

    When performing the climax of "Romeo and Juliet", after Romeo just died, Mister Blower whispers, "Now," and Eve Draper as Juliet wakes up very happily and then gasps when she sees Romeo
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    My favorite part of this is Blower adjusting himself after dying as Romeo.

    12. Danny missing a fundamental aspect of Angel's joke.

    Mister Blower says, "Oh, officers, again, let me extend my sincere apologies for earlier," Angel says, "It's quite alright, Mr. Blower, drive safe," and Danny says, " "Oooh, 'drive safe,' oh my god, you know that's the bloke we done for speeding earlier"
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    13. "Tits."

    Sergeant Fisher says, "Must have hit the sign at some speed, took the whole top off," PC Doris Thatcher says, "I've had my top off in his lay-by," and PC Bob Walker says, "Tits"
    Working Title Films

    This also happens later with "cocks."

    14. The gendered question.

    Danny asks, "What made you want to be a policeman," Angel says, "Officer," and Danny says, "What made you want to be a policeman officer"
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    15. Messenger being a very serious journalist at a just-burned-down home, where a person died.

    Messenger says, "Angel, quick word," Angel says, "A statement will be issued shortly," Messenger says, "I just wanted to ask, what's your perfect Sunday," Sergeant Fisher says, "I'll deal with the press, my perfect Sunday is a lovely, long dot dot dot"
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    16. The glare.

    Detective Sergeant Andy glared at Angel, leaves frame, Detective Constable Andy makes a face at Angel, then Detective Sergeant Andy comes back into frame to glare at Angel again
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    17. This tiny one that I absolutely love.

    Inspector Butterman says, "Start interviewing everyone who was at the fete," Detective Sergeant Andy says, "Ugh," and Detective Constable Andy says, "He's got shorts on"
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    18. Angel and his monkey.

    says, "This ain't a city, Mister Angel, not everyone's a murdering psychopath, it's high time you realize that, you and your monkey," then Danny lifts a stuffed monkey he won earlier and says, "Did he mean me or that"
    Working Title Films

    19. An hour and a half in, we get the reveal that Sergeant Turner's very different moods are due to there being two Sergeant Turners.

    The chippy Sergeant Turner says, "You really want to process all this lot, my pen's running out," in a different scene, Sergeant Turner grumpily says, "Nobody tells me nothing," and then later we see there are actually two Sergeant Turners
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    20. The return of the fascist and the hag.

    While pointing a gun at Angel, Cooper says, "Fascist," and after Angels kills her he says, "Hag"
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    21. The fruit attack.

    A grocery store employee yells, "Fruit attack" as a bunch of them throw fruit at the cops
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    22. The swan absolutely making the big chase scene.

    Butterman and Skinner are about to hit the swan, so they swerve, and then Danny and Angel are about to hit the swan, and Angel picks it up and puts it in the car
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    The fact that the swan is why Butterman fails to escape is so good.

    23. And finally, the planted name of the kid in the model village.

    Sergeant Andy says, "Blower represents most of the village, do you want us to go through the phone book," Constable Andy says, "We'll call Aaron A Aaronson," then at the end of the movie, the kid Angel's talking to says his name is "Aaron A Aaronson"
    Working Title Films

    The model village itself is also mentioned in the phone book scene ("You want to be a big cop in a small town? Fuck off up the model village.")

    There are so many other fantastic jokes in Hot Fuzz — from the evidence locker code being 999, to everything Simon Skinner says (including "supermarché"), to, like, all of the editing — but I'll leave it here.

    Working Title Films / Via

    Now go watch Hot Fuzz.

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