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    The 18 Stages Of Bumping Into Your Ex In A Public Place

    It's fight or flight time. Or hide behind a hedge time. One of those.

    1. Oh SHIT.

    2. *re-evaluates entire appearance*

    3. Why are they here? This is MY place.

    4. Is it too late to pretend I haven't seen them?

    5. Any emergency exits?

    6. How do I even greet them? I HATE them.

    7. Okay, remember that quote from Singin' In The Rain. "Dignity. Always dignity."

    8. Time to put a brave face on it...

    9. Small talk. Jolly good.

    10. Great, they're trying to make their life sound like it's going REALLY well now that I'm not in it.

    11. Jesus H Christ, this is hard work.

    12. "How am I doing? Really good. Really, REALLY good."

    13. "You look well." YES, YES I DO.

    14. I can't believe we used to go out.

    15. I can't believe we're having a conversation like we haven't seen each other naked a hundred times.

    16. Oh no, you have to go?

    17. The awkward goodbye.

    18. Thank Christ that's over.