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    How To Survive A Day At Oktoberfest

    I went to Oktoberfest and lived to tell the tale. It's not all about beer, but mostly it is.

    7:30 a.m.: Line up!

    9 a.m.: Enter your chosen tent. Marvel at how freaking huge it is.

    9:15 a.m.: Wait more.

    10 a.m.: Receive your liter of beer.

    10:30 a.m.: Realize you've almost finished your beer.

    11 a.m.: Realize you are a little drunk.

    11:30 a.m.: Decide you're starving.

    12:30 p.m.: Order another beer.

    1 p.m.: Feel inferior because you didn't get a traditional Oktoberfest get-up.

    2:30 p.m.: Sing.

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    Pretty much every thirty seconds, they start playing this song and everyone sings along at a deafening volume. You don't entirely know what the words are, because everyone is slurring them. You abandon your typical aversion to singing in public and go along with it. It's better than trying to strike up a conversation with these drunk people.

    3:30 p.m.: Make new friends.

    3:45 p.m.: Make eye contact with every person you come near.

    4 p.m.: Realize you've been here for 7 hours. Switch tents.

    4:30 p.m.: Get lost.

    5 p.m.: Go on a ride.

    6 p.m.: Pass out.