1. People drying laundry or ironing in the road.
Because you can't afford to waste those five minutes of precious sunshine a year.
2. Buses that crack jokes instead of telling you where they're going.
"This is all very hilarious but how do I get to Bellshill?"
3. Completely insane Gumtree ads.
"Make joke to your boyfriend!"
4. Folk taped to lampposts in the middle of the day.
5. Utterly batshit newspaper headlines.
We've become so immune to these they just feel normal now.
6. Cheerfully rude trade vans.
7. And unnecessarily smutty Wi-Fi names.
8. Excessively sweary graffiti.
Sausage is a cunt, apparently.
9. Very insulting licence plates.
10. And massively OTT responses to parking fails.
Probably because the licence plates are so antagonistic.
11. Furious, blunt, sweary pub signs.
This is definitely a good way to make your customers feel welcome.
12. Teenagers trolling ISIS.
We should send a few young teams into the conflict zone, just to see what happens.
13. Meals served in pizza boxes instead of on plates.
14. Extremely strange posters.
15. People with traffic cones on their heads dressed as equestrian statues of the Duke of Wellington.
16. And, of course, people risking death or severe injury just to get a suntan.
Glasgow, there really is nowhere else in the world quite like you. Well done.