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19 Things That Sound Fake AF To Scottish People

Can you imagine qualifying for a major football tournament? Naw.

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1. That band you like actually playing a date in Scotland.

2. Getting a decent chippy tea in England.

3. Easily finding a foundation shade that matches your sun-deprived skin tone.

4. Siri immediately understanding what you say.

5. Having a barbecue in summer and not getting fucking drenched.

6. Remembering to take a carrier bag with you when you go to the shop.

Harsha Gopal

7. Finding a coat that can actually protect you from the cold.

8. Writing "Aye" without your phone autocorrecting it to "Ate".

9. Or finding a sun cream that actually works.

10. Finding a seat in a beer garden on a sunny day.

11. Staying sober at Hogmanay.

12. An English shopkeeper accepting your Scottish banknote calmly and without complaint.

13. The BBC getting something right about Scotland.

14. Going for a nice swim in the sea.

15. Enjoying a camping trip.

@doctorwibble Avon Skin So Soft effective against Scottish midges when you're camping?Aye right! Isle of Rum last yr

16. Finding a cheap pub in Edinburgh.

17. Or a bar that isn't full of hipster shit.

Instagram: @hankstrummer

18. Scotland qualifying for a major football tournament.

19. And, of course, voting in a referendum and feeling happy with the outcome.