22 Scottish Mysteries That Are Far More Confusing Than Loch Ness
Why Scotch pie and bean pizza exists, and other mysteries.
Why any of our cafés have outdoor seating areas.
How this book ends up in everyone's bathroom.
And why every Scottish household owns one of these tea towels:
Why we do such terrible things to food.
And why we're so obsessed with batter.
Why everyone's grandparents have thousands of CDs like this.
And why all mums have at least one of these DVDs.
Why Scottish pubs still think this is an original joke.
Why anyone drinks Buckfast.
Why we pay £100+ each year to spend a weekend wallowing in muddy wee and listening to DJ Tiesto.
Why we've allowed the Krankies to be celebrities for so many years.
Why anyone eats "well-fired" rolls.
Why we regularly serve food in pizza boxes and cups.
Why we find swearing so incredibly funny.
Why River City is still a thing.
Not to mention kilt towels.
Why we're all willing to risk death to get a tan.
And why we never wear enough suncream.
Why we have so many place names that are pretty much exactly the same.
Why we consider climbing huge fuckoff mountains to be a casual, easy day out.
Why we choose to live in a country that's so deeply unpredictable.
And, most importantly of all, why we don't dress like this all the time.
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