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21 Truly WTF Signs That Scotland Needs To Explain Right Now

Explain yourself, Scotland.

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1. This sweary sign on the Forth road bridge.

"Fuck man" is actually the strongest wind force on the Scottish Beaufort scale.
imgur.com

"Fuck man" is actually the strongest wind force on the Scottish Beaufort scale.

2. This truly useless plaque.

Good to know.
imgur.com

Good to know.

3. This extraordinary place name sign on Orkney.

Twinned with Kuntt in Germany. Probably.
imgur.com

Twinned with Kuntt in Germany. Probably.

4. This extreme overreaction to a chip shop closing down in Edinbrugh.

"Just deep-fry the fuckin' mice and ah'll eat the cunts."
imgur.com

"Just deep-fry the fuckin' mice and ah'll eat the cunts."

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5. This terrible-value special offer.

"What is maths?" – The National Trust for Scotland.
imgur.com

"What is maths?" – The National Trust for Scotland.

6. This unhelpful timetable.

No need to be accurate or helpful! It's not like it's cold or exposed on top of a mountain or anything.
imgur.com

No need to be accurate or helpful! It's not like it's cold or exposed on top of a mountain or anything.

7. This fish and chip shop sign in Edinburgh.

That's guaranteed to give children nightmares.
imgur.com

That's guaranteed to give children nightmares.

8. This slightly worrying offer.

Is it gluten-free?
Twitter: @isla_thomson

Is it gluten-free?

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9. This baffling request in an Aberdeen pub.

Maybe they should start serving food.
imgur.com

Maybe they should start serving food.

10. This farty street name sign.

Which gets stolen by St. Andrews students all the time.
funnyplacenames.tumblr.com

Which gets stolen by St. Andrews students all the time.

11. This chilling warning sign in the Highlands.

It could be worse, at least they're not rabid. Probably.
imgur.com

It could be worse, at least they're not rabid. Probably.

12. This table reservation sign in Glasgow.

Instagram: @scott1187

Fanny Man: The Marvel superhero Glasgow deserves. And got.

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13. This special offer, which doesn't make much sense.

Is the barber really shit? Is it to settle people's nerves? So many questions.
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Is the barber really shit? Is it to settle people's nerves? So many questions.

14. This complete oxymoron.

Everybody who passes this sign: "WELL IT'S NOT SECRET NOW IS IT?"
Flickr: ilike / Creative Commons

Everybody who passes this sign: "WELL IT'S NOT SECRET NOW IS IT?"

15. This epic shop name war in Edinburgh.

Well, they share a door, so why not share a name?
imgur.com

Well, they share a door, so why not share a name?

16. This excellent burn.

"Yeah, we told Isis!" "Yeahhhhh."
Twitter: @johnandlouie

"Yeah, we told Isis!" "Yeahhhhh."

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17. This holy shop with a very holey name.

"Hurr that means something rude." "Should we tell them?" "Naw."
benrobertsphoto.tumblr.com

"Hurr that means something rude." "Should we tell them?" "Naw."

18. This weird sign from a Glasgow newspaper.

Instagram: @lastyearsgirl_

Why is zimmer in inverted commas? Why did this happen? Why?

19. This unappetising-sounding dinner option.

Foreskin fillets? They really will eat anything in Scotland.
imgur.com

Foreskin fillets? They really will eat anything in Scotland.

20. This bafflingly bad effort.

You might be cheap, pal. But you're also quite shit.
imgur.com

You might be cheap, pal. But you're also quite shit.

21. And finally, this sign for student wankers.

"Please go home and masturbate if you are bored." Thanks, Scotland, will do!
reddit.com

"Please go home and masturbate if you are bored." Thanks, Scotland, will do!