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23 Scottish Words That Make Everyone Else Go "Er...What?"

Finally, the Scottish translation guide you've all been waiting for.

Posted on / Creative Commons / BuzzFeed

1. Cunt – Man, as in:

Hate when a cunt yer no expectin says awrite an ye hit back wae a pure high pitch HIYA then think about it for the rest ae yer pathetic life

2. Wee cunt – Baby, as in:

Why dae folk ask babies stupid shite lit "Ur gettin big arent ye?" As if the wee cunts gony be like aye Moira yer spot on am oan the protein

3. Bird – Woman, as in:

Trying to remove yer arm from under a birds neck when your spooning them without waking them is the scariest game eh jenga you'll ever play

4. Spiceboy – Preening, permatanned man, as in:

@JH3894 aye awright ya spiceboy juggernaut, away back tae yer Ibiza countdown

5. Sesh – Getting off your tits, as in:

People need to realise "The Sesh" isn't a few pints of Dark Fruits. It's still been off your face on MDMA at 6am having a convo with a lamp.

6. Maw – Mum, as in:

@AndoHugh Mate your maw took 9 months to come up with a joke..

7. Janny – Janitor, as in:

@Ryan_Thomson23 @dafc111 @steghepburn Mates janitor at school was a wee fat guy that was going bald and he got called Janny DeVito 😭😭😭

8. Chapping – Knocking, as in:

Police brutality in america is fucking awful man polis in scotland probably flip coins for who's chapping the door and who's dain the talkin

9. Scoosh – Spray, as in:

Whys iOS10 changed the gun emoji to a water gun? When a use the gun a mean a literaly wanty kill masel no scoosh ma temple wi some tap water

10. Dobber – Dick, as in:

Sleeping naked is all well and good until yer maw whips the covers off ye in the morning to wake u up and yer sitting wae yer dobber oot

11. Pumping – Fucking, as in:

12. Cutting – Walking, as in:

maw bought aldi shower gel that smells like fairy liquid so I've been cutting about all day smelling like a fucking plate

13. Pish – Piss, as in:

am so bad for over-packing like yeh al just bring tons more pants in case a pish masel every day that am there

14. Afters – Post-pub party, as in:

dae goths have afters? like the moon's nice the night lads mon back tae ma haunted pad for a can a monster n a mosh pit

15. Hawn – Hand, as in:

aye don't put the change in ma hawn sit the coins flat on the counter so av tae claw n fondle them back awkwardly in front ae ye for 6 days

16. Sound – A good person, as in:

Results aren't everything ! A didnt do highers n look at me, am.....well am unemployed right noo but am sound as fuck

17. Wee – Small, as in:

always say "wee" infront of every word when am talking to customers, "hold on a wee minute, il get a wee bag for u ya wee cow"

18. Dug – Dog, as in:

When i see a police dug I deliberately act pure suspicious hopin to get inspected by Sgt. Good Doggy actual gies a wee cuddle Officer Fluffy

19. Melon – Idiot, as in:

Hate when u ask someone where something is and they go 'try opening yer eyes' try dodging this jab ya melon

20. Wain – Child, as in:

No way did a drunk lassie on the train just tell me she doesn't want wains cos she loves dogs n went "Nae wains great dains"

21. Junkie bun – Top knot, as in:

A feel like such a catfish when ppl like my pic from the night before n am lyin half deed in bed with a junkie bun n a face full a sudocrem

22. Gear – Drugs, as in:

On ma driving lesson n ma instructor goes "it's really easy to get inty gear" n am sittin there lit Gerry mate fkn tell me abt it x

23. MWI – Drunk, as in:

issue wi males that think it's acceptable to comment on how a girl looks when she's mwi am no oot tae be stunnin am oot tae cut mad shapes

Comedy Central / Giphy