1. When you look at the "trending topics" on Facebook and one is about Scotland.
2. Finding Tunnock's Caramel Wafers at an English supermarket.
3. Or Marshalls Cheesey Macaroni.
4. Or Irn-Bru when you're abroad, which always feels like a miracle.
5. When the weather forecaster reports that it's actually hotter in Scotland than in England and then looks a bit startled and cheated.
6. And when we get snow at Christmas, but the rest of the UK doesn't.
7. When you go outside in summer without a jacket or umbrella and it turns out you didn't need a jacket or umbrella and you feel like an all-powerful god.
8. Introducing a non-Scot to life-changing delicacies, like tattie scones and deep-fried haggis.
9. Waking up on a summer's morning and finding the omnipresent blanket of grey cloud has broken up slightly and you can see a wee bit of blue.
10. When your favourite TV show introduces a new Scottish character and they aren't violent, ginger, or an alcoholic.
11. Or a troubled, brooding police detective.
12. Googling a random Just Eat voucher code and finding it actually works.
13. When you get a free 2-litre bottle of juice with your takeaway.
14. Or free prawn crackers. Or free anything (even though you know that just means you've spent a load of money).
15. Seeing a traffic cone on the head of any statue, but ideally a horse.
16. Bumping into other Scottish people when you're on holiday.
17. Or people from your hometown (for an added thrill).
18. When you take off your watch on a hot day and see a faint-but-definitely-there tan line.
19. "You're Scottish? Awesome! That's so cool. Let me buy you a drink."
20. When a friendly shopkeeper decides to waive the 5p bag charge with a cheeky wink and conspiratorial nod.
21. When someone hands you their day ticket when you're waiting for a bus.
22. Waking up on 2 January and realising you still don't have to go to work.
23. When you go to Greggs and the sausage rolls have just come out of the oven.
24. Seeing the proud, battered "Welcome to Scotland" motorway sign when you're on your way home.
25. Having both tattie scones and hash browns with your full breakfast like a carby badass.
26. Hearing 500 Miles by The Proclaimers in a club, or The Bonnie Banks o' Loch Lomond literally anywhere.
27. The long, proud, droning, slightly farty wail that bagpipes make when they're warming up.
28. When a friend comes to visit you and actually wants to hang out and catch up instead of making you show them the sights.
29. When you just make it to the off-licence at 9:57pm after a mad, panicky dash.
30. Three words: Chips And Cheese.
31. Three more words: Complimentary Breakfast Buffet.
32. When you use a sneaky Scottish swearword in front of English people, knowing they won't realise how rude you're being.
33. When you get a fancy, shiny new plastic fiver with your change.
34. When someone offers you what you think will be a boring, bog-standard biscuit then hands you a tin full of Caramel Logs instead.
35. When you manage to carry all of your shopping bags up your tenement stairs in one go to avoid multiple trips, even if it does lacerate your fingers.
36. When you risk a camping trip in Scotland and it's miraculously sunny and you feel like you've won the holiday lottery.
37. When you use the self-service tills at the supermarket and get through the entire process without having to summon an attendant.
38. Getting a Scottish bank holiday off work when you work for a company based in England, and you know your southern colleagues are in the office.
39. Shouting all the lyrics to "Flower of Scotland" at rugby matches, even if you aren't actually that patriotic.
40. England losing at football (sorry, we just can't help it).
41. When it's finally cold enough to break out your vast supply of woolly scarves, giant socks, big furry hats, and gloves.
42. And when you finally get to put all those things away nine months later.
43. When you're running late but the bus is running late too so it drives extra fast and you feel like you've chartered a private jet.
44. When you get on a train at rush hour and ScotRail has actually added an extra carriage for once so you don't have to cling to the roof.
45. When the trolley service of drinks and light refreshments is a) available, and b) starts right next to where you decided to sit.
46. Getting a ferry, even if you live on an island and have to do it all the time for boring reasons.
47. Work colleague: "Would you like some homemade tablet?"
48. Being told your accent is sexy by someone who is sexy.
49. When a band you like decides to do a gig in Scotland and doesn't cancel it at the last minute.
50. When you spot a free Greggs sandwich voucher in the paper and remember to cut it out and actually use it.
51. When you actually remember to bring the right change for the bus and don't have to panic-run to the cash machine, then buy chewing gum you don't want.
52. When there's a traditional folk band playing at a pub you're in and they aren't utterly terrible.
53. When you see a Gaelic sign and (just about) understand what it says.
54. Whenever the SNP does something bolshy and hilarious at Westminster, like clapping or eating a roll and slice during Prime Minister's Questions.
55. When a previously unknown Scottish actor blows up in the US and you can say "I remember when he played a corpse on Taggart."
56. When you pick up a prescription and don't have to pay for it.
57. When a London shopkeeper accepts your Scottish money without argument.
58. When you're in a pub and it doesn't shut at 11pm.
59. The bit in Braveheart where they all show their bums to the English.
Thanks to Alison Prior, Helen Cairns, Suz Gibson, Jayne Johnson, Mary Robbs, Audrey Loudon, Ian Dunn, and Paul J. Cortopassi for additional suggestions and inspiration.