21 Photos That Prove Scotland Is A Fictional Country

*Googles “national animal of Scotland”.* Wait, what.

1. Real places have landmarks on their TripAdvisor pages. Not women called Mary Johnston.

2. And they don’t have mysterious messages written on their money. That only happens in spy novels.

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4. Trampolines do not migrate south for the winter.

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5. And cows don’t commute to work.

6. No real country would take a piper in full regalia with them to Antarctica.

8. And their political leaders don’t take time out of their day to help gay couples get married.

...Paul (seen here on one knee) asked me to deliver his marriage proposal to Ian on his behalf 2/3...

— Nicola Sturgeon (@NicolaSturgeon)

9. Or tag along on a stag do.

I'm at a stag in Scotland so of course the stag met Nicola Sturgeon.

— Tobi exp. 2016 (@tobiwilson56)

10. This would never happen in a real country.

11. Also, real places uses buses as a rail replacement service. Not cows.

12. Santa would never get shitfaced and climb a statue. Not in a real country anyway.

Santa's just been arrested outside my work. Climbed up the horse and rescued by a cherry picker. Only in Glasgow.

— Mark D. Morrison (@MDMuk)

13. Also, and this is very important: Real places rarely elect penguins.

14. Coming back from the shop to find a seal pup on your dashboard? Nope, definitely not real.

please display baby seal on dashboard. if you lose your baby seal you will have to pay for a full day of parking.

— Flannery O'Connerd (@Slennon_)

15. Feral goats? Yeah, right.

17. We’re on to you now, Scotland: No way is this a real place name.

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18. Or this.

@WhatTheFFacts there's a village in Orkney, Scotland, called Twatt

— Tam Smith (@Tamus1)

19. And definitely not this. In fact it’s bare-faced plagiarism.

20. In short, there’s no way this is real life.

21. And the evidence is there for everyone to see.

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Wake up, sheeple.

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Hilary Mitchell is the Scotland editor for BuzzFeed and is based in Edinburgh.
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