Guess what week it is. Guess. What Week. It. Is.
Week 8 is here and we are officially halfway through what could be the most unpredictable NFL season in recent memory. Before we get in to our projections for Week 8, we need to get a few things from Week 7 covered: Chris Johnson put up 17 points in Week 7. If you listened to us (Gavin..) and started him, proceed to basking in your own glory. You deserve it.
Here we go with the HefferBrew Hump Week Start ‘em or Sit ‘em:
Teams on BYE: Ravens, Texans, Colts, Bears, Chargers, Titans
- Matt Stafford - Did you know that this sidearm chucking frat boy is the 2nd highest fantasy football scorer – second only to Peyton Manning? Now you do. Against a Dallas defense that allows plenty of aerial opportunities, and a big man named Calvin in the end zone Stafford should continue his scoring rampage.
- Terrelle Pryor - He’s been a pretty stable player so far this season, and coming off a BYE week is normally a bad thing for the Raiders but the Steelers aren’t your dad’s Steelers and Terrelle will be a lot to deal with for them all day. He also has the Black Hole on his side.
- Carson Palmer - Not our favorite person. We often refer to him as a Cheeto shareholder of some sorts.. but in the spirit of fairness, Carson has everything he needs to put up a big game at home against a struggling Falcons team.
- Robert Griffin III - Now, Andrew Luck looked next level against this Broncos defense last week. We aren’t exactly saying RG3 will repeat the same feat this week, but he more than likely will come close.
- Ben Roethlisberger - Although we made the statement of this “not being your daddy’s Steelers, Ben has looked good the last two weeks, and for anyone looking to fill a BYE space he’s available in over 17% of most league.
- Michael Vick - He’s hurt, and a slightly gimpy Michael Vick is a ticking time bomb for further injury. He may start against the Giants, but we don’t have faith that he will finish. Carson Palmer is available. Pick him up instead.
- Anyone Minnesota decides to start - No really, It would be cute to think that one of these guys (Freeman, Ponder or Cassel) could be competent. Against a more than awful Giants team, Freeman looked like a lost child and the other two are lost children. Poor Adrian Peterson. This should be a no-brainer though.
- Thad Lewis - if you’ve been riding the Thad train to win town. This will be the week you don’t. The Saints are coming off a BYE, and minus one defensive snafu against the Patriots, the Saints hadn’t allowed over 20 points in game.
- Tom Brady - Even with a peachy match up like the Dolphins, Tom just hasn’t looked that good. Even with the return of Gronkowski, Brady still looked flustered, and at times, seeing ghosts. It’s a rough season for Brady, and it’s most likely only gonna get worse.
- LeSean McCoy - Shady is primed for a big one here. Sure, the Giants held Adrian Petersen to less than 50 yards, but it had nothing to do with the Giants being effective. The Vikings decided to run an experiment with Josh Freeman that failed horribly. The Giants still can’t stop a back like McCoy and he is sure to do more than his ~9 points from week 7.
- Eddie Lacy - As long as he can stay healthy, Lacy is starting to become the difference maker Green bay had hoped he would be. With an upcoming match up with the Vikings, Lacy has every opportunity to grind his way to 80+ yards and a TD.
- Frank Gore - The Jaguars, literally, have the worst rushing defense in the league. They gave up over 100 yards and a touchdown to Ryan Matthews. Nuff said.
- Marshawn Lynch - The Rams, like the Jag, are top-three when it comes to being absolutely pathetic when it comes to stopping the run. Like a screen door on a submarine that already has a hole in it.
- LaMar Miller - Although the Dolphins struggled against the Bills last week, the Bills have come around to be a decent defense, all-around. The Pats on the other hand have lineman dropping like the intro of a Skrillex song. As well as being the third worst rush defense in the league.
- Willis McGahee - The Browns face the beastly Chiefs in Week 8, and you can pick any reason you would like from the following for not starting him: He’s old. Chiefs are not old. Poe is a huge dude. The Browns O-Line. and so on.
- Le’Veon Bell - It’s a gut pick here, but the Raiders are hungry and are surprisingly good as they continue to develop more chemistry on defense. Bell put up respectable numbers against a weak Ravens team but never found the end zone, and he has to do more to be a must start in our book.
- Maurice Jones-Drew - Don’t even get cute, whether he’s filling in for someone on a BYE, or else. Just sit him. The Niners are terrifying again, and they’re an awfully ran team traveling to a foreign country. They’ll be more interested in Dr. Who history and whatever England has to offer. It’s just a giant Dr. Who museum over there, right?
- Alfred Morris - Denver can be passed on, certainly. Run on? No. Not at all. They’ve made the likes of Shady McCoy and recently (maybe on the decline?) Trent Richardson.
- Giovanni Bernard/The Law Firm of BJGE - The Jets can legit stop the run. They aren’t as awful of a team as we all expected, but one thing they do really, really well, is stop the run.
- Pierre Garcon - The Redskins take on the Denver Donkeys in Week 8 and while the run game will be pressured early and often, Denver allows plenty of chances down field for opposing receivers, in or out of garbage time. Plus, the Broncos are last in the league against the pass. RG3 and his favorite speedster will more than likely dominate Denver’s older and smaller secondary.
- Justin Blackmon - This guy will finish the season as the king of garbage time yardage. Cecil Shorts is still sore, and the ball just seems to rain on Blackmon no matter what. Through 3 weeks of playing time, he already has 38 targets for 25 catches.
- Eric Decker - Evil Peyton will be in full effect on Sunday, and look for him to continue to call Deckers number as he’s easily one of Manning’s most reliable receivers in a litany of reliable pieces of crap. (Cameron: I don’t like this stupid team. Sorry.)
- Dez Bryant/Terrance Williams - Williams enters with a TD in his last three games, and going against the 29th ranked pass defense in the league, in Detroit, he’ll look to continue the trend. Bryant on the other hand said today, “I can do whatever Megatron (referring to Calvin Johnson, and not saying he can do whatever a fictitious cartoon character can do. Cause that would be insane.) can do”. I believe him, so We’ll see.
- Dwayne Bowe - Ew. A $50 Million distraction, he may see a couple targets on a short dinky route, but he is not the deep threat he was billed to be because of the strict West Coast game plan Andy Reid is running. Sadly for Bowe owners, the Chiefs are undefeated and are showing zero signs of wanting to change their winning formula.
- Steve Smith - He got some yards and a touchdown this last week. That’s great. he’s still old and a midget (Little person? I don’t know if it’s not PC calling a non-midget a midget.).
- Stevie Johnson- The Saints have resumed their place as one of the most dominant teams in the league since regaining the suspended Sean Payton back as head coach. Where the team has impressed the most though is Rob Ryan’s new defense. Coming off a BYE week and after a last second TD pass from Tommy Terrific gave them their first loss; this defense will be looking to shut down the Bills and the first part of that is keeping their top receiver’s impact at a minimum.
- Josh Gordon - The player most likely to be subject to tons of trade rumors before the Oct. 27 deadline, Gordon has been able to manufacture yards and catches out of seemingly nowhere. This week he has to go against the only undefeated team in the NFL; the Chiefs. Brandon Weeden will be under pressure all day and the secondary of the Chiefs will likely send double coverage Gordon’s way, most likely including Brandon Flowers, who’s one emerging as one of the top corners in the league.
- Saints - It seems like a no-brainer but Buffalo’s scored at least 20 points in every game this season and since his insertion into the starting lineup Thad Lewis has been a solid game manager who hasn’t turned the ball over much. They’ve also yet to play a team as out to prove something as these Saints seem to be. As much as it hurts to say this as a Bills fan, the Saints should likely control this game handily.
- Bengals - With each week it’s been a Jekyll/Hyde story with rookie QB Geno Smith for the Jets. Some weeks he looks like he’s completely bypassed any rookie struggles and growing pains and others he seems to make sloppy decisions under pressure. Coming off a good game (although a controversial win) against the Patriots and going against a Bengals D that can force turnovers and always seem to come up big in key games, it’s hard to think he’ll duplicate the success he had against New England so expect Cincy to have tons of opportunities for big plays on defense.
- Falcons - Carson Palmer throws interceptions, it’s a fact of life. Sometimes he has good games, sometimes he has awful games, but he always has interception games. If the Falcons pass rush can get to Carson early and throw him out of any rhythm, then there’s sure to be a few lame ducks ready to be grabbed, not to mention a Cardinals O-line that can’t stop anything from breaking through. The Falcons D will find points somewhere on the field,
- Packers - Hot mess. That’s the only phrase that can describe Minnesota right now. No matter who’s throwing the ball, the offensive line won’t be able to buy them enough time in the pocket and then, considering the astonishing incompetence Josh Freeman displayed in what could be the worst Monday Night Football game ever, the odds that, even if they get time to throw, it’ll make it to the receiver should be enough to ensure that the injured but scrappy Packers D should be starting if you own them.
- Cowboys - The ‘Boys have been good not great on defense so far but going against the Lions, there’s just too many options for Matt Stafford and crew to choose from. Reggie Bush has returned to form and it’s beautiful, Calvin finally let Johnson handle everything that’s not football and looks more focused than ever and emerging receivers like Kris Durham and Joseph Fauria ensure that the Lions will put points on the board one way or another.
- Steelers - The Steel Curtain has been getting better and better as the season has gone on but facing the Raiders can yield a mixed bag of results. Terrelle Pryor is only getting better with more experience and Denarius Moore and Rod Streater are building a good chemistry with him as well. Pryor’s mobility is also something that will test the Steelers early and often.
- Eagles - The Giants always seem to show up in divisional games and after a (albeit ugly) slight return to form where Eli doesn’t turn the ball over and the offense plays with general competence, the Eagles D is a shaky start given all the weapons at Eli’s disposal.
- Buccaneers - Cam Newton and the Panthers have looked good the last few weeks and though Mike Glennon seems to be doing good with the Bucs offense, their defense is a whole other story with Darrelle Revis not looking like the man Tampa signed to a stacked contract in the offseason.
As always, thanks for reading and good luck in your match ups. May the fantasy dominance force be with you.
- Trump has named H.R. McMaster as his new National Security Adviser, replacing Michael Flynn, who resigned last week.
- Russian ambassador to the UN Vitaly Churkin has died after suffering from cardiac arrest this morning, a day before his 65th birthday.
- Senator Ron Wyden will soon introduce legislation requiring warrants before phones can be searched at the US border.
- A girl's best friend showed up to her date in a fake mustache to spy on her and it is the definition of friendship goals 😎