back to top

14 Things That Make Women Happy That Men Will Never Understand

They say men are from Mars, women are from Venus. If that's true, they like some pretty strange stuff on Venus - just ask Hector. Hector and the Search for Happiness is in cinemas August 15.

Posted on

What makes women tick? This question has long baffled men...

...so we've asked this woman for her two cents on the following mysteries of womandom.

BuzzFeed / travishodges.co.uk

Her cat was unavailable for comment.

1. Filling an online shopping basket, checking the total, then closing the page.

cheezburger.com

A Real Woman Says:

"It's because we're the gatherer part of 'hunter / gatherer'! Also, it's fun to play the 'What would I buy with unlimited money' game now and then."

2. Doing juice diets.

forgifs.com

A Real Woman Says:

“We only like them because they're touted as a quick fix in all the magazines – but they don’t even work. Especially when you give up five minutes in and eat a pie.”

3. Looking at paint swatches (and knowing the difference between colours).

A Real Woman Says: Apparently it's a science thing - men can see less colours than women. In reality they're just lazy and don't want to talk about colours.
Geri Lavrov/Geri Lavrov

A Real Woman Says: Apparently it's a science thing - men can see less colours than women. In reality they're just lazy and don't want to talk about colours.

4. Slapping on lotions and potions.

vinescope.com / Via forgifs.com

A Real Woman Says:

"Who wouldn't want baby-soft paws instead of chapped fisherman's hands? You need a different potion for each body part. You wouldn't use soap on your teeth, would you?"

5. Doing pilates (men don't even know what it is).

gifbin.com

A Real Woman Says:

“It's actually really relaxing - and you're far less likely to get heckled by spotty teens than if you ran round the park.”

6. Having friends you kinda hate, but love talking about.

cheezburger.com

A Real Woman Says:

“Sometimes we do this: telling stories about that 'one friend' to illustrate how 'good' we are in comparison. Sometimes that friend doesn't even exist and we made it all up.”

7. Buying fancy yoghurt.

youtube.com / Via ohmagif.com

A Real Woman Says:

“We're all allocated a certain amount at birth that we have to eat within our lifetime.”

8. Starting a new notebook.

A Real Woman Says: Okay, we don't always maintain a high standard, but you must admit - girly handwriting is much nicer than men's.
BuzzFeed

A Real Woman Says: Okay, we don't always maintain a high standard, but you must admit - girly handwriting is much nicer than men's.

9. Dishwasher-packing strategy (men suck at this).

cheezburger.com

A Real Woman Says:

“We know this trick – men just do such a crap job they'll never be asked again. Unless we're the ones who've got this wrong, and the purpose of the dishwasher IS to fill every bowl you own with greasy, grey water...”

10. Going to the bathroom in pairs.

cheezburger.com

A Real Woman Says: There is safety in numbers. Also it gives you a chance to talk about everyone you're sitting with.

11. Buying smelly candles.

not-fairytale.tumblr.com

A Real Woman Says:

“It's our way of tricking you into thinking we've cleaned the house: now that it's too dark to see and it smells like citrus."

12. The hallowed eyeliner flick.

marthamoon.tumblr.com

A Real Woman Says:

“The perfect eyeliner flick is near-impossible. This is real reason Amy Winehouse turned to drink...”

13. Spending all day with someone, then ringing them up to chat more.

gifbin.com

A Real Woman Says:

"Erm, hello? We do it to discuss the day's talking…"

14. Enthusing about soft furnishings.

ohmagif.com

A Real Woman Says:

“We do it because men would live in a flat furnished with orange crates, cardboard-y MDF furniture and hand-me-down from their mate Baz's gran if they were allowed.”

What really makes you happy? See Simon Pegg go in search of it in Hector and the Search for Happiness, in cinemas August 15.

View this video on YouTube