When you're feeling like this:
And doing too much of that:
Draw the curtains, place a cool flannel on your gross sweaty brow and leave it to this man to talk to you in the dark through the medium of the internet:
The now ex-Simpsons voice actor Harry Shearer's Le Show has been running for over 30 years on various radio stations under various names. He has YEARS of archives available.
HANGOVER TIP: GO BACK IN TIME.
If you choose an old episode, you basically just get to hear Harry Shearer reading old newspapers aloud, alone in a room.
Here's a scientific fact: it's plain soothing to hear all the Simpsons voices at once read you months-old news. Because you know how this all ends.
This is just comforting noise now. Like a babbling brook. Like whale sounds that mean something to humans.
Delight! as Shearer reads you the "Apologies of the Week" – the public apologies you already forgot the original reason for.
Bask and moan! as Shearer's "News of the Warm" washes over you – all the new stories that you forgot to read about global warming.
Sigh and whimper! as Shearer rounds up the "Sos of the Week" – all the sentences starting with the word "so" in news programs.
Think about dinner! during "Leak of the Week" – when Shearer gives you the latest on some oil leak that happened during whatever week he's broadcasting from.
FOR EXAMPLE: Here's Shearer broadcasting from a hotel room in London two years ago, reading a public apology about an affair with former Democratic presidential candidate, John Edwards, and a story about formaldehyde in baby shampoo.
No more tears.
And in this one there's a story about how you can use whatever name you like, real or fake, on Google+.
What a relief.
Obviously you can listen to new episodes because they're equally great, BUT their effects on hangovers are disputed by self-appointed BuzzFeed hangover scientists. Find solace in shit that no longer matters.
Here's you listening to Harry Shearer's Le Show on Saturday afternoon.
Thanks Harry.
