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    Sep 15, 2016

    27 Things You Learned While Living In Manchester

    "City or United?"

    1. You avoided the back of the bus like the plague.

    Twitter: @scouse_hanky

    And dramatically rolled your eyes at how annoyingly loud they were playing bad music back there.

    2. Your school had an ongoing rivalry with another school for no apparent reason.


    3. You always met your friends outside Burger King in Piccadilly Gardens.

    Twitter: @Murph82

    But never actually went in there to eat.

    4. And everyone at school would say their clothes were from "Primarni".


    So original.

    5. You thought you were an absolute legend hanging out at Urbis.

    Remember when Sam spent our fucking train fare on a Morrissey shirt and one of my extensions fell out on Urbis :/

    6. And you became an elitist after your first eye-opening trip to Afflecks.

    7. You took pictures with every cow during the Cow Parade.

    Flickr: julianebeckton / Creative Commons

    Beautifully painted sculptures in our crumbling city made Manchester a paradox in 2004.

    8. You've probably seen the famous shirtless rabbit man around at some point

    9. You remember queueing up for your first gig at The Academy.

    The MEN and Apollo may keep switching between being the Manchester powerhouse venue, but we all enjoyed our Academy gigs the most.

    10. You had to listen to older generations whine about making the move from Lancashire to Greater Manchester.

    @BingFez I'm in Greater Manchester, not Lancashire, old man.

    They still refuse to write out the technically correct address.

    11. And you know that Mancunian pigeons are well advanced.

    I've just seen a pigeon using the stairs to get from one place to another! Fly you lazy little shit you've got wings! #onlyinManchester

    12. You perfected the art of dodging the guy selling mixtapes on Market Street.

    13. And desperately tried not to make eye contact with any of the statue people.

    Twitter: @robbacrab

    Although if they liked you they might give you a lolly.

    14. You learned to not bother trying to get a seat at the Arndale food court.

    15. And you immediately broke into a jog upon hearing, "Oops, you dropped your smile."

    Warner Bros Television

    16. Any time you mention being from Manchester, someone will ask you "United or City?"


    17. You know that crisp butties are the absolute best hangover cure.

    18. You often find yourself craving a nice corned beef hash.

    19. And you know that meat pie and gravy is best washed down with a cold can of vimto.

    20. Everyone pronounces "couldn't" like "c*nt".


    You've learned to be offended by nothing because what sounds like an insult is probably a compliment.

    21. Every sentence starts with "I swear down" and ends with "you know what I mean?"


    22. And you have no concept of grammar in expressions like "I'm going town."


    If someone says they're "going into Manchester" you know they're a posh prick.

    23. The Christmas markets were equally exciting every year, even though it was excruciating to walk through the crowd.

    Twitter: @amdchow

    But the food is so worth it.

    24. And no one knows why the Manchester Wheel appears and disappears at random intervals.

    @phantastichemmo @AmazingPhil if the Manchester Eye is gone where the hell did they put it, it's a freaking FERRIS WHEEL!

    25. You still associate the smell of weed with homeliness.

    America has been incredible but I'm looking forward to getting home and the smell of shit weed that lingers around Manchester

    26. You wouldn't blink twice if you saw this man walking outside.

    27. And most importantly, wherever you are in Manchester, you know that there is a Greggs just walking distance away.

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