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1. A ~bootyful~ mouse pad capable of supporting your wrists between two thicc cheeks as you surf the web for more butts.
Get it from Amazon for $15.85 (two colors).
2. A corgi butt cookie cutter so you can bring God's greatest gift to earth (corgi butts) to the potluck and watch everyone swoon.
3. An *asstounding* jumbo peach squishy that'll give you the same comforts of squeezing the real butts 🍑.
Get it from Amazon for $5.99.
4. A pug butt pin or a reverse mermaid pin to accessorize with a fluffy butt or sparkling ass and become the great butt whisperer everyone envies.
Get them from From Caliko on Etsy: the pug butt pin for $10+ and the reverse mermaid pin for $12+ (choose from two types of pin backs)
5. A cat butt coloring book for anyone who is tired of living an ass-deprived life and needs to color some cat butt in space to cope.
Get it from Amazon for $5.99.
6. A luscious travel-sized cream for the butt so you can get your booty rubbed as you travel the world on a *tour of booty.*
7. A six pack of chocolate anuses your mouth will truly find to be an ~area of outstanding natural booty.~
Get a box of six milk chocolate anuses from Amazon for $9.68.
8. A precious bunny butt pillow for anyone who has always dreamed of an Etsy shop entirely dedicated to animal butts 🐰🍑. Time for those dreams to come true.
Get it from Booty Farm on Etsy for $30.
9. A Gudetama egg plushie (owned and loved by yours truly) you need right heckin' now. Lemme tell ya', squishing this incredible egg ass after I come home from an honest day's work is all I live for.
10. And a lil' bby Gudetama figure to keep the mood light when life gets a lil' too *heavy booty.*
Get it from Urban Outfitters for $13.99 (one out of eight random figure, includes accessories and collector's card).
11. A set of strong butt magnets that'll hold up all your post cards on the fridge with the power of their magnificent cheeks.
12. A corgi butt coin purse and a corgi butt pillow because let's be real, if home is where the heart is then all our hearts belong to corgi butts.
13. A cat butt tissue holder (in two colors) that may or may not bring some sweet-ass relief to your nose next time you have a cold, or cry because you're getting old.
Get it from Amazon for $34.94 (two colors).
14. A pastel butt mug, Pusheen mug, or Tina mug perfect for those mornings when you have no intention of getting off your ass 'til you get some coffee.
15. An adorable card you'll give to your S.O. when you're at the ~rear end~ of romantic gestures. Nothing says ily like the butt touch.
Get it from YeaOhGreetings on Etsy for $4.
16. A juicy strawberry planter so you can feel love for your plants and a planter that resembles a gorgeous butt in the air at the same time.
Get it from Pansy Ass Ceramics for $25.
17. And a budding booty vase for anyone who wants to do away with subtleties and let their adoration for booty burst 🍑🌷.
Get it from Pansy Ass Ceramics for $250.
18. A faux tail butt plug to attract all the attention to the booty when you're having a sexy-ass time.
19. A highly *adogable* set of pug coasters that just may encourage your guests to work what their mama gave them the next time you throw a party.
Get a set of six various pug coasters from Kazvare Made It on Etsy for $33.66.
20. An extra thiccc tushy cushion for your cheeks to rest, because a ~sleeping booty~ is a beautiful booty, but an "omg my butt is so numb from sitting in this car for six hours" booty is just...no.
Promising review: "This pillow has changed my life at work. I'm a teacher and I'm on my feet a lot, and I suffer from occasional lower back pain. Since public schools are on a budget, buying teachers ergonomically correct chairs is not a priority. As a computer teacher who types a lot, the hard wooden chair is just the right height, so it works for me, but it's not comfortable for my back. I wish I had known about this pillow sooner. It's soft, but firm. It gives just the right support for my back, and the unique design of this pillow forces me to sit straighter, so it improves my posture without me noticing anything. My mother had back surgery recently and has trouble sitting for any length time. I bought this for her to make sitting at her kitchen table more comfortable — and she loves it! If you have any kind of lower back problems, sciatica, etc., or just want to sit more comfortably — this pillow will improve your life wherever you sit." —W. Golden
Get it from Amazon for $29.95.
21. A set of colorful doggo butt hooks so you can hang up your pup's leash when you're not taking that cute lil' pup butt for a walk.
Get a set of six rubber hooks from Amazon for $24.93 (assorted colors).
22. And a dazzling, close-up print of a bumble butt you'll want to *dive* your eyes into forever. Honestly I've never seen a more worthy piece of art for fellow butt-adorers in my whole ass life.
Get it from Campo De Flori Studio on Etsy for $22.20 (two sizes).
You when all your ~bootyfull~ dreams come true:
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