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    It's Time To Talk About The Wildest Thing That Happened On "One Tree Hill"

    Name a more iconic TV moment. I'll wait.

    One Tree Hill was an absolutely ridiculous show.

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    There were multiple kidnappings, car crashes, murders, coma dreams, runaway brides, dangerous pregnancies, etc...you name it.

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    But there's one thing in particular I want to talk about. A moment so wild, so utterly unrealistic, so completely ridiculous that it makes anything on Riverdale look tame.

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    And no, it's not Nanny Carrie. It's not Quinn and Clay hallucinating themselves in a dream world. It's not even Clay FORGETTING HE HAD A SON.

    Clay looking at Logan then saying "You're telling me that he's my son?"
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    Although, remember that storyline? Season 9 was truly bonkers.

    It's this:

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    I'll never be over this moment.

    In case you forget, let me set the scene for you: Dan has a heart condition and has been on the list for a transplant for a while. He finally gets to #1 on the list after an actual reverend dies, and he's stoked.

    Dan holding the beeper that tells him when his heart is ready saying "My name is Dan Scott and my number is 1"
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    Side note: One Tree Hill's dialogue was *chef's kiss*.

    Then, of course, he's hit by a car and kidnapped by Nanny Carrie, meaning he doesn't get the heart.

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    Naturally.

    His luck changes when he comes back and a heart becomes available — he goes to the hospital in great spirits, even having this exchange with Lucas:

    Dan says he's getting a heart and Lucas says it's about time
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    Lucas almost seems...happy for him? I know he's being sarcastic/talking about Dan's metaphorical heart here, but still.

    But there's trouble: some guy is there with his dog, who's consumed a lot of weed. Dan's petting the dog when suddenly the man with the leash moves, pulling it taut, causing the man holding Dan's heart to trip...

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    ...AND DROP THE HEART ON THE GROUND.

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    I...have no words.

    And then the high dog RUNS OVER AND EATS THE HEART.

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    Who thought of this?? Who wrote this?? Did this idea come from some strange fever dream??

    Everything about the scene is perfection, but I have to focus on the reactions here.

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    The guy who dropped the heart just saw his career flash before his eyes. The nurse gives us a great silent "Oh shit." And the guy who owns the dog DOESN'T EVEN NOTICE.

    But the best reaction in Lucas's. (He's inexplicably back.) He reaches down as if to pet the dog, then looks up and realizes what has happened. And then...

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    I almost felt bad for Dan here.

    HE LITERALLY GLARES AT DAN AND SHAKES HIS HEAD LIKE "YOU SHOULD'VE KNOWN BETTER."

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    WHAT DOES IT MEAN?? Even if my dad was a horrible guy who killed my uncle, I think my first response to ANYONE'S heart transplant FALLING OUT ON A HOSPITAL FLOOR and being EATEN BY A DOG would be more surprised than this??!! Lucas is straight up NONPLUSSED.

    And then THAT'S IT. It's NEVER mentioned again. Lucas does not tell his fiancé Peyton or his BROTHER (Dan's other son, the one actually raised by him) about this. He does not share this wild story at parties like I do. He is affected in no way but this insane occurence!!!

    Julian asks Lucas in his next scene if Peyton is okay and Lucas says yes then asks him what's up
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    Even in Tree Hill, this kind of thing warrants a discussion, I think!

    As for Dan, he goes on to be just fine. He wanders in the ocean to yell at God for his fate, then between Seasons 6 and 7, he and Rachel illegally buy a heart from a still-alive kid. (But that is a story for another time.)

    Dan yelling at the sky "Is that best you can do? A crazy bitch nanny and a dog? Is that supposed to be some kind of karmic lesson?"
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    It's not even mentioned on Dan's TV show in Season 7! Honestly, this whole event is worthy of its own book. A Dog Ate My Heart and Other Things I Probably Deserved by Dan Scott. How this was not a world-altering event in the One Tree Hill Extended Universe is beyond me.

    TL;DR: This is the absolute wildest thing to ever happen on a teen drama and other shows have yet to top it. It was a cultural reset and I have not been the same since. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

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