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    20 Winston Bishop Insults That Still Make Me Laugh

    "You're sweating so much, it looks like rain."

    Winston has got to be my favorite New Girl character.

    But one of his most overlooked traits is his ability to give it straight to the other roommates and keep them all humble. Below are 20 of the best times Winston brought the others down a few pegs:

    1. When Winston single-handedly solved the problems of the apartment while humbling every member, including himself:

    Winston says Nick and Jess need to shut up because they're just having sex, not inventing it. Then he tells Schmidt to stop taking it out on everyone and deal with his breakups, then says there's no way he has a cat brothel and is still the most normal

    2. And then did it again when they all interrupted his sleep:

    Winston tells Nick he's sweating so much it looks like rain, then tells Schmidt he's in the prime of his life. He tells Cece to get rid of the motorcycle, then tells Jess "don't act like you haven't thought about us too when you're going solo"

    3. When Schmidt tried to understand Winston's upbringing and Winston schooled him on both what it meant to him to be Black and how annoying Schmidt was:

    "Being Black means whatever I want it to mean. And you know, the fact of the matter is, I live in a loft with three people who happen to be white.But believe you me,  there is so much more that I find annoying about you that I haven't even gotten to race"

    4. When Winston made fun of Schmidt's thick toenails:

    Winston: "I mean, I have never wondered if you could shimmy up a palm tree." Schmidt: "But it's because I have a keratin surplus. I mean, they're not that bad, look at these things!" Winston: "Ah! Schmidt! It looks like an open swiss army knife!"

    5. And again when Schmidt walked away:

    Winston saying "They sound like a dang old crab"

    6. When Winston simultaneously roasted Nick and everyone in the apartment, including himself:

    Nick: "So I've decided to give up on women and put all that energy into...tomatoes!" Winston: "You know what, it was on us for thinking this wasn't going to be stupid"

    7. When Nick tried to weigh in on police brutality, and Winston shut it down right away:


    8. And again:

    Winston says this is something Nick can't understand. Nick says "I just feel like..." but Winston says he can't weigh in. Nick says "I know, but I..." and Winston repeats he can't weigh in, then when Nick tries one last time Winston just says "Shh, don't"

    9. When Nick did a horrible Eddie Murphy impression, and Winston said this:

    "Was that your Eddie Murphy? That was so bad, it wasn't even offensive"

    10. When Winston wasn't afraid to tell Jess's mom her cooking was subpar:

    Winston saying "I don't want to lie to you, so I'm not...there's shells all in these eggs"

    11. When he told the parents of one of Jess's students that their daughter was awful:

    "Your daughter sucks, okay? She is the demon seed. She is the spawn of Satan. And I do believe I speak for the entire human race when I say that people like her should not be building robots"

    12. When Nick was procrastinating, and Winston was not here for it:

    Winston telling Nick, "Nick, it's not that hard, man. Just sit down and write. You ain't Hemingway"

    13. And then he called out Nick on all of his flaws:

    "You're not a finisher at all, man. That's why you didn't finish law school. The same reason why you're only three episodes into 'Downton Abbey.' I get it, man, you're scared, and that's okay. Be scared. Just stop wasting my time!"

    14. When Nick finally finished his zombie novel, and Winston gave his first impression:

    Winston holding Nick's zombie novel saying "Nick, this is the worst thing I have ever read in entire my life. You misspelled the word 'rhythm' 38 times"

    15. When Aly revealed she'd been unfriendly because she was worried Winston would fall in love with her and it would ruin their work dynamic, and Winston called her out:

    Winston calling Aly conceited, saying "Don't nobody want your babies!"

    16. When Schmidt made fun of Winston for not being able to use a ruler, and Winston fired right back:

    "You can't even wash your own underwear, you dumbass!"

    17. When Winston tried to make Schmidt feel bad, but it didn't quite work:

    Winston: "You're right, Schmidt. If I was doing something stupid, you definitely would be involved." Schmidt: "You're damn right I would be"

    18. When Winston was NOT here for Reagan refusing to be friends with the roommates:

    19. When Nick was jealous that Winston was spending so much time with his girlfriend, and Winston said this:

    "I'm sorry, I didn't know it was my fault that your life sucks and you're so miserable. Look at yourself! You look like one of those guys who crawls out of the grave in the Thriller video"

    20. And finally, when he roasted himself: