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Jeans Suck, And It’s Time We All Admit It

Please, see the light.

Hey guys! Quick question!

  1. Do you like jeans?

    Do you like jeans?

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Do you like jeans?
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Thanks for answering that!! Now, I need you to listen very carefully: if you checked yes, you are either A BIG FAT LIAR or in some SERIOUS denial, because jeans are terrible. This is just a fact.

First of all, denim is the most uncomfortable fabric on the planet.

Second of all, jeans are simply not made for human beings. Got thick thighs? Large calves? A small waist? JEANS WILL NOT FIT YOU. This makes shopping for jeans an absolute nightmare.

Even after you find a pair that fits, within weeks they'll look like this, because jeans are trash:

Sure, I guess they're fine if you're just standing there like a forgotten Sim. But if you want to do literally anything else besides standing, beware. They will push back.

Don't get me started on people who wear jeans to the gym, or even worse, SLEEP in these burlap sacks of torture.

"But Hannah, what about stretchy/skinny jeans?" you might be asking. "Those are comfy!"

Skinny jeans are EVEN WORSE. Jeans are not one-size-fit-all, and denim is not meant to be stretchy. All skinny jeans do is cut off your circulation. Not to mention they're impossible to get on or off.

But worst of all? JORTS. Or, as I like to call them, denim diapers.

Actually, I lied. The one thing worse than jorts? Jeans with holes so big they're basically JORTS IN DISGUISE.

TL;DR: Jeans are horrible and if you like them you're wrong.