Here's the deal: Below is a combination of completely made up hipster dishes and actual meals offered on restaurant menus around the country. Try to separate the hipster meals from the real ones.
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This is on a real menu
Yup, this is a real menu item offered at Chillmark Tavern in Martha's Vineyard. And if you're wondering, tatsoi is not a karate move, but a mustardy, leafy vegetable, and matboucha is a tomato-based Moroccan spread. The more you know!
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If you order the breakfast sandwich at Sqirl in Los Angeles, you'll be greeted by this creation. Maybe then you can get back to me about what the heck a "sheeted egg" is.
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This is fake.
Although it probably exists somewhere...
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This is fake
Though I wish it weren't.
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This is on a real menu
Olympia Provisions in Seattle sure does offer a fancy-ass Caesar salad. But why settle for romaine when you can use chicories?
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This is fake
Sounds pretty damn good though, doesn't it?
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Chicago's Lula Café certainly isn't dishing up your boring old potatoes. If you need help translating, cardoons are a cousin to artichoke, and cured egg yolk is a synonym for heaven on a plate.
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This is fake
But you'd totally order it, wouldn't you?
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At Central Provisions in Portland, Maine, you can enjoy this fancy grilled Asian-inspired eggplant. While I can't tell you exactly what miso sabayon is (anyone, Bueller?), cara cara oranges are a step above your typical navel oranges, with their pinkish-red flesh and intense flavor.
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This is on a real menu
Step into the Walrus and the Carpenter in Seattle and you can nosh on this ever-so-delectable pork belly. The yuzu kosho aioli is a Japanese condiment made from chilis and yuzu citrus.
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This is fake
Believe it or not, the 60-minute egg is, in fact, a thing (it's boiled at 62.5°C for 60 minutes). However this dish is a complete figment of my imagination.
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You can find this seafood dish at Manhattan's Thursday Kitchen. And let's just take a minute to acknowledge Riesling gelée. It's WINE JELLY, people!
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This is on a real menu
At Launderette in Austin, start your meal off with this hipster speciality. It features lebneh (which is a Lebanese yogurt dip), bright pink hummus, some crunchy birdseed things, and fancy crackers.
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This is fake
I'm not even sure if chili jus exists, but it sounds like it should, especially among the hipster crowds.