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How Gross Is Your Boyfriend?

Or your ex boyfriend. Or your friend's boyfriend. Or every boy you know.

Posted on
  1. Tick all the things your boyfriend does:
    Check
    Farts a lot.
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    Does farts that smell like a herd of small animals have died and are slowly rotting inside his body.
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    Farts a lot and does it purposefully in your direction or directly onto you, to be funny, even if he has to chase you around the house to do it.
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    Goes multiple days without washing.
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    Does a little underarm wipe instead of a shower sometimes.
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    Pees in the shower.
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    Pees ON YOU in the shower.
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    Wears the same jeans without washing for more than a week.
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    Wears the same jeans without washing for more than a month.
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    Wears the same jeans without washing for so long you don’t even know the last time they were washed.
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    Eats messy food and wipes it on his jeans.
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    Wipes his nose on his sleeve.
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    Shaves and leaves little bits of hair all over the sink.
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    Shaves just randomly around the house and leaves little bits of hair everywhere.
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    Eats in bed.
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    Eats in bed and leaves the dishes/bowls behind.
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    Spills food and drinks in the bed. And crumbs.
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    Re-wears socks.
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    Re-wears underwear.
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    Re-wears the same T Shirt for approximately 100 years.
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    Doesn’t wash his hands after peeing.
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    Doesn’t wash his hands after peeing, and then TOUCHES YOU WITH HIS PEE HANDS.
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    Doesn’t wash his hands after doing a POO, because he is a MONSTER.
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    Scratches his balls.
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    Scratches his balls IN PUBLIC.
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    Scratches his balls IN FRONT OF YOUR ELDERLY GRANDMOTHER.
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    Just like, holds on to his penis or fiddles with it for no reason while in conversation with you.
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    Gets pee on the seat because he’s sure he has “good aim”.
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    Gets pee on the floor.
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    Lifts the seat to pee but leave behind a sticky terrible residue.
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    Somehow wees on the very back bit of the toilet which is difficult to clean.
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    Brushes his teeth and spits out bits of toothpaste which end up in weird places, hardened and sad.
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    Twists the toothpaste tube to death and leaves it with the cap out so the whole tube is ruined, hardened and sad.
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    Lets out loud burps.
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    Chases you around the house to make sure you don’t miss his really loud burp.
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    Eats food off the floor.
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    Eats food that’s definitely too old to be eaten. And somehow never get sick.
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    Picks his nose.
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    Picks his nose and rolls up his snot into tiny dry blobs and leaves them around.
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    Puts snot on the wall.
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    Leaves damp towels on the floor.
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    Leaves damp towels on the bed.
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    Leaves damp towels on random countertops miles away from the bathroom.
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    Comes out the shower holding his dirty boxers, then throws them in your face to be cute.
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    Leaves dirty clothes for so long that they start to stink up the room.
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    Leave great puddles of drool on his pillow cases (which he doesn't often wash).
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    Just doesn’t wash his bed sheets often enough.
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    Blocks the toilet.
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    Blocks the toilet to the point of it overflowing.
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    Leaves “skid marks” in the toilet.
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    MAKES USE OF “CUM SOCKS”.
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    MAKES USE OF “CUM SOCKS” AND LEAVES THEM AROUND.
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    MAKES USE OF “CUM TISSUES”.
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    MAKES USE OF “CUM TISSUES” AND LEAVES THEM AROUND.
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    Throws the "cum socks" and/or "cum tissues" at you IN ORDER TO BE “FUNNY”.
    Check
    Just does gross things in order to be gross, or without realising that he's gross, because boys are gross.
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