Quiz

BuzzFeed Staff

BuzzFeed

Which one of these colleagues is carrying all the best secrets?

Can You Pick The Biggest Office Gossip?

Angela knows a thing or two about what REALLY happened at the Christmas party. You can tell she knows some real shit by the way she chuckles to herself whenever Greg walks by her desk. _What does Angela know about Greg that she isn't telling anyone?_ Unfortunately, Angela prides herself on her professionalism, and will only share the details of Greg's presumably embarrassing Christmas party disaster with her non-work friends and her feminist short story-writing class.

Sorry, no luck

The thing about Doris is, she THINKS she knows some crazy gossip, but really her hearing is so bad that she's got it all wrong. Poor Greg, for example, once told her "I'm from Essex!" but what Doris heard was "I'm for sex!" She thought it was a rather odd thing to say, but went ahead and told everyone in the building that Greg is a sex addict anyway. "He's for sex!" she'd say with a shrug and a wink. "Kids these days!"

Nope, she doesn't know shit

God, Steve THINKS he knows all the gossip, but everything he knows is, like, two years out of date. If you run into him in the tea room, he'll whisper, "did you know that Angie and Dominic HAD SEX?!" and he'll look so excited about it that you won't have the heart to tell him they started dating last year and now live together.

DEFINITELY not him

Michael doesn't know much – he's just the REASON for most of the office gossip. See, most people in the office are actually desperately in love with Michael. They love his easygoing confidence, his crisp, white shirts, and his salt-and-pepper beard. Even though he's never actually gotten involved with any of his colleagues, he's the cause of four of their broken hearts, two of their shouting matches, and countless of their loud, drunk confessions at the pub. Oh, Michael. When will you share all that love you have to give?

Not him!

Ankur's only been here a week. He has no gossip to share at all – he doesn't even know where the toilet is. He has to keep running across the street to the coffee shop to use their toilet. It's much too late to ask any of his colleagues where the toilets are now – he'll just have to pretend like he loves flat whites so much he has to have five a day. Poor Ankur!

No, he's brand new

Laura is one of those people who's so nice, you almost think she's _too nice_. You can't figure out how to bond with her, because if you ever try to bring up some great gossip with her, she just laughs politely and changes the subject. You've decided that Laura is either really, really boring, or having a torrid affair.

Wrong choice

Oh, Andy. Rumour has it that Andy enjoyed not one, but \*two\* snogs at the Christmas party. He'll deny it, of course – and since he's afraid of people hearing the gossip about HIM, he'll certainly never bring up anybody ELSE'S gossip. He'll never be your source for dirt, but, on the plus side, he'd probably snog you at the Christmas party.

Nope, not him

Christine knows a good chunk of the office gossip, but not ALL of it. She can tell you who's had sex and who hates who, but she's not entirely sure HOW many times those people had sex, and WHY those other people hate each other. If you put your heads together, you can probably fill in the blanks.

Close, but not quite

Raj is the biggest office gossip by a GODDAMN MILE. See, the thing about Raj is, his desk is RIGHT NEXT to the supply cupboard, which is where all the best gossip is exchanged. Why don't people realise he's _right there_? Do they WANT HIM to hear about their ridiculous crushes and workplace disputes? Anyway, Raj has worked out a way to leverage what he knows to advance his social and professional relationships. He's never creepy about it – he didn't ASK to hear about Sandra's drunken flirting with Steve the night before, after all – but, if you buy him a drink, maybe he'll let you know the details.

Yup, you found the biggest gossip!

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Can You Pick The Biggest Office Gossip?

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