We recently shared a post about the red flags that made people walk away from their relationships. Many commenters also opened up about the red flags and final straws that made them leave their partners. Here are their stories:
Warning: Some submissions contain mentions of domestic violence, substance abuse, eating disorders, and sexual harassment.
1. "About a week shy of dating for four years, my partner said, 'I'm not even sure I believe in love.' That was the immediate end."
2. "I was about four months into dating a guy when he noticed I took a pill in the mornings. One day, he randomly started talking about depression (right as I was taking the pill). He went on about how he thought taking a pill for depression was a major red flag and he couldn't stand people who were insecure/depressed. I asked if he thought that was what I was taking (it wasn’t), and he said he didn't know, but he had an ex who was insecure about everything and ended up needing to be on meds for depression and wanted to make sure it wouldn't be that way with me."
3. "I was at a wedding out of town. While I was walking, I stepped wrong and broke my foot. I couldn’t walk at all, let alone drive. We were three hours away from the nearest hospital and it was 11:30 p.m. We had my car, but I needed my ex to drive me back to town. On the drive, as I was elevating my foot and keeping my eyes closed to ignore the pain, my ex said something weird like, 'Wow, I can’t believe you haven’t even noticed or cared. I’m driving you this far and this just shows how little you care.' I opened my eyes and see my ex's pants down around their ankles, expecting me to give them a blow job or hand job on the drive back. I kindly said that is wasn't safe since it was pitch black and I was in too much pain to do anything. Also, we were already on a break, and I did not want to."
"I got yelled at for the remaining two-hour car ride about how I’ve changed and am so selfish for not doing that and how any other girl would 'jump on that instantly.'"
4. "He offered to let me stay at his place after our first date (long distance), and then changed his mind at 11 p.m. and made me sleep in my car during a blizzard. He still wanted to go for breakfast in the morning though. One time, he showed up to a date three hours late and hungover. He also made me watch porn that featured women with a similar body type because he wanted me to 'see what I looked like.' I would take him out to celebrate his achievements, but he never acknowledged mine. It took a long time for me to learn I didn’t deserve to be treated like this."
5. "He said I should stop talking to my friends and family, because he was enough for me. I didn't. Unfortunately, I stayed for too long and still struggle with diagnosed PTSD after that asshole."
6. "He left me alone at my dad's funeral because I 'interrupted' him showering earlier that day when I took him a towel."
7. "While I was dating my ex, we hit a rough patch. He was the type that was ALWAYS looking for something to argue about, or digging up something from before I even knew him to 'see if I lied' about something. So, by this point, I had completely distanced myself from him. He felt this, and talked me into going on a cruise with him (that he surprised me with). We get on the damn boat and I’m all excited, naming off everything cool that we should do, and all he wanted to do was stay in the cabin and have sex. At this point in our relationship, I didn’t want to touch him at all. So, of course, I said no and left to do shit by myself. Anything he did for me (like buying me wine at dinner) was because he wanted sex in return."
"When I obviously wouldn’t fuck him, he would go through my phone while I was asleep, go through my luggage, or try to hack my Facebook. Fuck him."
8. "He decided that regular potatoes were unhealthy, so he would only allow sweet potatoes in the house. Sweet potato wedges, sweet potato fries, sweet potato mash, baked sweet potatoes, etc. Also, the only oil that could be used was coconut oil, so everything that needed to be cooked in oil was cooked in coconut oil. I would eat on my way home and pretended I wasn't hungry after cooking his sweet potatoes in coconut oil buffet."
9. "I dated my ex, who was a recovering alcoholic, for about six months. I had a trip planned to visit my brother back east for Thanksgiving, whom I hadn't seen in three years. The week before my trip, my ex started freaking out not wanting me to go, saying it was selfish of me to leave him around the holidays. He had a TON of close family that lived nearby and lived with three roommates. He threatened to start drinking again if I left. The day I got to my brother's house, he broke into my house and called me drunk to tell me it was all my fault, I was making him fall off the wagon, and by the time I'd be back, he'd be dead on my floor, so I needed to come home right now. Needless to say, I called his parents, who immediately handled the situation, then I ended the relationship. It wasn't the drinking, it was the manipulation."
10. "I dated a man from eastern Europe for seven months after my divorce while I was in my 'I need a partner to be happy' phase. Nothing I did was right, but the straw that broke the camel's back was when he told me I had no business buying orange juice at the store because we had a tree on our property and he was going to buy me a juicer. A) Fuck you, I have a juicer the tree does not produce year-round. B) Don't tell me how to spend my money. C) Fuck you! I didn't need someone I was dating to treat me like a 10-year-old."
11. "My ex would continuously criticize my body and what/how I ate. He would always say how he 'only liked skinny girls' and that if I gained weight, 'he wouldn’t be attracted to me anymore.' I was under 100 pounds at the time and had been dealing with anorexia for years. He caused me to go into a major relapse, and when I was depressed and starved, he dumped me because I was 'being too negative these days.'"
12. "I met a guy who wined and dined me. He was filthy rich (worked for a hedge fund) and thought money was the way to my heart. We went out for two months when he started dropping hints about being longterm. One night, we were at some black tie gala and I overheard him talking about how I was the perfect ‘accessory’ and how he loved showing me off to his clients. He said one client was into me, and maybe he’d let him ‘borrow’ me. He was dead serious."
13. "I had an ex constantly tell me I was 'crazy' when I questioned him about the girl he had obviously cheated on me with. We had an on-and-off relationship for three years, some of which we kept quiet from friends because he said he needed less judgement from others putting pressure on us. I was young and didn't realize that was code for 'so I can put my dick about without people realizing I am cheating on you and then telling you.' I finally ended it when we had a huge fight about the above and I picked up my car keys to leave. He physically wrestled them out of my hands and fractured my fingers. I erased him from my life after that."
14. "I bought a blender without consulting my much older, non-live-in boyfriend. He went through a bad divorce and was insecure that I was 'doing things without him' I guess? He’s my ex now."
15. "A guy that I was talking to for ages unfollowed me on Instagram and stopped talking to me because I was fan-girling on TikTok over Timothee Chalamet. He didn't say a word until I reached out to him."
16. Finally: "I had an ex tell me I was a shitty girlfriend for not sleeping with him while we were away. Mind you, we were gone for a week and we were staying at my PARENTS' HOUSE. Like, what? I’m not screwing under my parents roof. How disrespectful and creepy is that?"
Have you ever walked away from an unhealthy relationship? What was your breaking point? You're welcome to share your story in the comments.
Note: Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.