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    People Shared Cringeworthy Messages They've Received And I Want To Throw My Phone

    Is there a way to un-read something?

    We asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to share the most absurd messages they've received from online dating. Here are the cringeworthy results.

    1. This man who definitely has his shit together:

    An angry message reading, "Hey thanks for ignoring me, guess successful men with their shit together isn't attractive to you" followed by the same person saying "Hey there"

    2. This "uncomfortable" revelation:

    A new message reading, "My farts are really wet. It's a little uncomfortable"
    buzzfeed.com

    "No, I did not care to read more." —dvi9cybe

    3. This person just looking for love:

    A message reading, "Just by looking at my pictures and reading my profile, do you think at one point you will be able to love me?" with a smiley face

    4. This non-fuckboy:

    A long message of a man ranting that a woman must understand his terms and conditions and that when women respond to him like little bitches, he will treat them like little bitches.
    buzzfeed.com

    "I wouldn't send this guy nudes so I got this response..." —sarahc316

    5. This seafood lover:

    A message asking, "How many seafood dinners would it take to turn you into a bedroom acrobat for years to come?" with the response, "I'm more of a Golden Corral buffet kind of girl"
    buzzfeed.com

    "He responded with, 'Then you're probably not the girl for me.' Too right, you are!"

    sgoedegebuure

    6. This "nice, decent guy:"

    A message of a man attacking a woman saying she will live a lonely, desperate life as a librarian and explaining he only got dumped by another woman because he didn't want to have kids. He keeps attacking and telling this woman good luck finding anyone

    7. This unwarranted response to someone's hospitalized father:

    Someone pushing for some amazing sex after the other person said their dad was in the hospital

    8. This accomplished fellow:

    A message reading, "I wipe my own ass"

    9. This poetic intro:

    Intro message reading, "Roses are red. You're cute as a duck. Let's Netflix and chill in bed, and then we'll cuddle"

    10. This "weird" one:

    A man messaging a woman about how he hates actors but people keep weirdly forcing him into acting projects because he just has the look

    11. This...nipple-sucker?

    A message reading, "Hola! Not to suck my own nipple of anything but what I offer is rare and you'll never find it in anyone else. Plus I'm fucking hilarious" with a winky face. The responding message reads, "You get a D+ for that intro. Try again"

    12. This unoriginal perv:

    A guy trying to pick up a girl saying he can't call her beautiful yet because beauty's on the inside and he hasn't been inside her yet

    13. This never-ending nightmare:

    Numerous messages of a person essentially talking to themselves about bubble baths, smexi shoulders, and a chocolate heart as they wait for someone to give them attention
    buzzfeed.com

    "These still have me cringing years later." —maxh42ad06405

    14. This anatomical wonder:

    A message reading, "I am no millionaire. But I have million inch shlong"

    15. This "no-prude" zone:

    A guy saying he doesn't have time for prudes after getting rejected

    16. This mix-up:

    A guy answering his own tinder messages from two years ago
    buzzfeed.com

    "There’s this classic." —goldenwanders

    17. This history buff:

    A guy asks, "What does the constitution say about sucking my cock?" and the recipient responds saying small things are a choking hazard

    18. This enthusiastic opening line:

    A message reading, "I love goth bitches"
    Maria Rotelli

    —Maria Rotelli

    19. This highly specific assumption:

    A message reading, "You look like the type of girl that would shush me in the library then politely ask me to eat your ass"
    buzzfeed.com

    "It’s been three years and I still can’t." —tess212

    20. This incredibly honest approach:

    A message where a person admits they are about to turn themselves in for jail for 20 days because of a DUI and ask for wine and sex before they go
    buzzfeed.com

    "Sent by a middle-aged stranger (I'm in my twenties)." —samthesinger1

    21. This man who has already moved on:

    An angry man saying he starts a cleaning job in 7-10 days and will be making $25 an hour so he doesn't need this anyways

    22. This serious question:

    An intro message asking the other person to have a foursome with them and two other girls

    23. And finally, this presumptuous claim:

    First message says "good morning beautiful" followed by "racist bitch" with no context

    Note: Submissions have been edited for length and clarity.