1.
Indie bands naming themselves 2002-2008:
2.
Who was Prime Minister when King Charles III ascended to the throne is going to be a really hard pub quiz question in about 20 years
3.
flatmate has just asked me whether i think the lettuce voted leaf or romaine in the brexit referendum and im frankly furious at how funny i found it
4.
How can someone’s out of office auto reply email be “OOO x” sjjsjdjdjdkjd the kids don’t give a HECK I love it
5.
My issue w Twitter is that I am talking to myself and strangers are talking to me.
6.
Give us some bars then.
7.
Overheard a university student say “Arctic Monkeys were my dad’s favourite band when I was little.” The passage of time is relentless, unfathomable, cruel, and unforgiving.
8.
people who don’t like Bounty’s think olives are gross, ask for their burger to come plain apart from the ketchup, and would make chicken breast wrapped in bacon if they ever got the chance to go on come dine with me. i said what i said!!!!
9.
I regret to inform that Judi Dench has just murdered Louis Theroux. https://t.co/mz0ODkvUL4
10.
Last night I went to a bar, with the understanding that well-behaved women make history all the time. But then I saw a neon sign which changed everything.
11.
My 3 year old son is currently playing with Duplo in the bath and talking to himself about “rocket boosters” and “giant robots.” And then he, genuinely, says to himself: “I’m not in the office on Wednesday I’m working at home.”
12.
The British public voting for Matt Hancock to do every Bushtucker Trial x
13.
Seems suspicious
14.
i’ve been laughing at this for two days
15.
All this Elon Musk stuff just keeps making me think of when Monica's millionaire boyfriend Pete wanted to become The Ultimate Fighting Champion
16.
Just gonna go to the CoOp by mine to spend about 18 pounds on like 3 items of food that I don't particularly need if anyone wants anything
17.
Can someone check on the guys naming kids’ garments at Trespass?
18.
we need a netflix series like the crown but is about the sugababes where each season just follows each generation of the band
19.
As if he’d ever be able to pull Heidi Klum https://t.co/ypW4OMtTuz
20.
me voting for Hancock to do every Bushtucker trial