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    18 British Tweets That Made Me Laugh Out Loud This Week

    "Among many contenders, the most embarrassing thing we do as English people is pronounce croissant: kwasong.”


    Wearing a beret in London: Nobody cares Wearing a beret in Sunderland: Somebody yelled out of a car 'bonjour!'


    A year ago my girlfriend lost her favourite necklace. She was running for a taxi & it snapped & went down a drain. Little did she know I contacted the council & asked them to search the drain. So...this Xmas I presented her a Topshop voucher cause the Council told me to fuck off.


    British people and their ability to turn every noun into an insult by prefaceing it with the word "absolute" is phenomenal


    among many contenders, the most embarrassing thing we do as english people is pronounce croissant: “kwasong”


    Gave my Dad Mr Bean cut out for Christmas and he’s been moving it around the house to scare my Mum


    Mad that a few years ago if you turned on the tv any time day or night it’d be showing My Name Is Earl and then one day it stopped and no one has mentioned My Name Is Earl since


    Life was genuinely better when I still believed the University Challenge teams sat on top of each other.



    Not only do I have a favourite frying pan, I also have a least favourite frying pan, which I consider my nemesis


    Sorry but this has finished me - are they expecting her to look like Peppa Pig??????? I'm done, done I tell you


    How anyone enjoys going to the pub on Christmas Eve is beyond me. It’s basically a room full of your Suggested Friends on Facebook



    I’d just like everyone to know that one of my pals thinks “what a sad little life Jane” is a quote from Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë and not from the greatest ever ending to come dine with me


    I’m not convinced my new toaster can quite deliver everything it promises.


    what are some of your favourite running family jokes? in my family whenever we see some hideous rag or minging bit of fabric or whatever we say “that’s mum’s wedding dress”. my mum didn’t have an ugly wedding dress or anything. we just say it. funny


    Me returning back to the family home on Christmas Eve after spending 10 hours day drinking with my mates at the local


    BOOM. Fuck you pal . I AM Christmas


    We've only just celebrated Jesus being born and the Coop are ready to mark his death

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