1. When your natural state is eating string cheese on the floor in your drawers:
2. When your other natural, default state is Just Fucking Can't:
3. When bae suggests "we should leave the house" and you have to remind them it's the weekend:
4. When you get caught up in your feelings, and a little existential, and you're wondering how time passed you so fast, and how quickly your children have grown (you don't have children):
5. Your bank account between Thursday and Friday aka payday:
6. When you abide by the NO FOOD GOES WASTED rule — no matter the circumstance:
7. When your student loan emails float into your inbox:
8. And you hit "mute":
9. When you and your friends decide you're going to do something "chill" but somehow end your night like:
10. When you literally don't know where you are and how you got here but you ordered the Uber with a 3.6x surge 'cause you promised LeAnn you'd make the early yoga class in the morning:
11. When you get your first (and last) blow-out:
12. When you show up to a party completely overdressed but you do your best to blend in:
13. When you and bae get into a heated fight and you need to walk away, but bae reaches for you, and you're like "DO NOT FOLLOW ME":
14. When bae has strict parents but you want them to come over 'cause yours aren't home:
15. When you laugh at all of Grandpa's jokes 'cause you know he'll give you some extra spending cash:
16. When all you could afford were the shitty seats at the concert, even though there are empty rows in front of you, but you're too scared to break the rules because you made eye contact with security once:
17. When you are between a rock and a hard place:
18. When you are feeling like literal trash:
19. But you'll always be and feel fine. Because pizza exists.
