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I Tested Hungry Jacks' New Seagull-Repellant Chips And It Was Terrifying

Bird: 1. Me: 0.

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Today, Hungry Jacks announced the launch of their "Pack That Scares Gulls" reflective chip cartons. Naturally, I needed to try them because seagulls are chip-stealing bastards.

Gyan Yankovich
Gyan Yankovich

At the moment, the shiny packets are available at eight coastal Hungry Jacks stores, including Sydney's Circular Quay, where I can attest that the gulls are goddamn savage.

At first glance, the new packs are just damn pretty. They shine, glimmer, and look great by the harbour. But would the holographic pattern actually scare off birds? I was skeptical.

Hearing the hungry squarks of gulls in the distance, I was also nervous.
Gyan Yankovich

Hearing the hungry squarks of gulls in the distance, I was also nervous.

I decided to ease into the test, crouching next to some gulls who were hanging out nearby.

My hot chips got their attention straight away. As I said, they're greedy bastards.
Tahlia Pritchard

My hot chips got their attention straight away. As I said, they're greedy bastards.

But, once I put the ~reflective~ pack into action, they seemed to back off.

Jemima Skelley

However, there's a pretty high chance it was my awkward twisting movements that scared them. I mean, I did look kind of insane.

After my low-key success, I moved into a high gull-traffic area, right by the water. This was where shit got wild.

They were there. Straight away. They swarmed me. I crouched. And screamed, just a little.
Tahlia Pritchard

They were there. Straight away. They swarmed me. I crouched. And screamed, just a little.

Honestly, I did my best to use the power of the chip packet to defend my food from the birds. But, in the end, one gull got the better of me and the cardboard.

Tahlia Pritchard
Tahlia Pritchard

See? BASTARDS!

He got me. He got me real good.
Tahlia Pritchard

He got me. He got me real good.

In the end, the seagulls won, but only just. Do I think the new packaging works? Well, I have one bird-bitten chip that makes a good case against its true gull-repelling power.

Be careful out there, guys. No chips are safe, no matter what they're in. Nice try, Hungry Jacks.
Jemima Skelley

Be careful out there, guys. No chips are safe, no matter what they're in. Nice try, Hungry Jacks.