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Russians Implicated As Terror Level Rises To Orange - Trump Supporters Picket, But Forget Why

The Associated Mess, Washington, DC, 24 October 2016. Secretary of Defense Ashton B. Kutcher announced a rising of the Terror Threat Level to Orange today, the highest level reached since the mid-2000s. The announcement comes in the wake of initial sightings of unidentified, low-flying aircraft that cannot be determined to be of any known civilian design. In a bizarre turn for these sorts of purported “sightings,” DOD officials have, in fact, confirmed radar contacts with the unidentified entities, the official finger not-so-surreptitiously quivering in the direction of Russian intelligence craft as the culprit. Both civilians and officials mutually agree that much of this activity appears to be sited over the Washington, DC metropolitan region. Secretary Kutcher stated that no action would be taken against Russia at this time, although he sends a stern warning to Russia that the nation stands at the ready. Meanwhile, alternative groups have, naturally, rejected DOD’s explanation. Dozens of protesters have picketed the White House that the aircraft are Unidentified Flying Objects of extra-terrestrial origin, and that a reckoning of the sins of humanity draws nigh. The protest soon dissolved, however, as a nearby rally for Republican Presidential candidate Donald Trump siphoned off the short attention span picketers.

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