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What Narcos Are You?

You're just a poor boy from the city trying to make good. So what if you make $60 million a day, you're still poor at heart. There's nothing you love more than Columbia. You're going to clean it, from all the corrupt and awful people. They've really let it go. With you in charge, oh things would be so much better. You're the kindest gentlest person out there, can someone with their own zoo be that bad?

You're Pablo Escobar

Oh how you miss the days of drinking beers with your bros and chasing down flip-flop wearing hippies on the beach. Now you're stuck in some place where they can't even speak AMERICAN, and it's not like you're going to learn Spanish. Jeez what's wrong with them. You're all about making America safer, but when a cat's not even safe, you start to wonder if it's worth it.

You're Steve Murphy

As a kid there was nothing you wouldn't do for a dollar. Now that you're grown up you've found the best job out there. Killing people, it's just like collecting Pokemon except instead of a Pokeball you use a gun. You're even keeping track with your fellow hitmen to see who really is the best. Because you gotta kill em all!

You're Poison

There's nothing you love more then girls, blow and Hitler. You just can't figure out why more people don't like Hitler, he was such a great guy. When you're not partying it up on your private island, you can normally be found helping your pal Escobar. Hitler's number one in your book, but Pablo's a close second.

You're Carlos Lehder

GUNS! Is there anything better in the world? No. There's no problem that cannot be solved with guns. Except maybe BIGGER GUNS. Friends and partners may come and go, but your Guns will be with you forever.

You're Gacha

You just want to clean up Columbia. Why won't anyone help you? You're incorruptible like Sean Connery in the Untouchables, just without the accent. You think about Escobar night and day, some may call you neurotic. But that's just because they don't understand your dream board with collages of Escobar. The dream board is the key to catching him, how do people not see that?

You're Carrillo

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What Narcos Are You?

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