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18 Jars Of Mayo That Need To Check Their White Privilege Immediately

A deep dive into racial dynamics and privilege through the perspective of the most persecuted condiment in modern society – mayonnaise.

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1. This jar of mayo thinks we should stop making a big deal out of other condiments because all condiments matter.

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Unless you wanna make a big deal out of mayo – that's totally fine.

2. This bowl of mayo costs more than these bowls of ketchup and mustard, even though they all do the exact same job.

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But it's not mayo's fault mayo's dad owns the fucking cupboard, is it?

3. This jar of mayo thinks we need to start leaving things in the past where they belong, like that bottle of spilt milk. And slavery.

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It's not like it had anything to do with mayo anyway, jeez, get over it.

4. This jar of mayo blames “political correctness gone wrong” for the fact it can’t refer to barbecue sauce as its “spicy brown friend”.


6. This dish of mayo is even starting to think that the word “mayo” itself is becoming a slur because it’s just stereotyping all mayos for being mayo.

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Even though the name "mayo" won't stop it from being bought and valued more than the other condiments in the cupboard. But it's just annoying, you know?

8. This jar of mayo doesn't understand the big fuss over cultural appropriation. If it wants to dress up like wasabi for Halloween it will.


10. This bowl of mayo romantically whispered "you're attractive for a bottle of ketchup" on a date, and doesn't understand why it hasn't been called back yet.

12. This jar of mayo doesn't get why other condiments are mad that it's on the top shelf, and they're at the bottom.

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Because if everyone worked as hard as mayo did, they'd all be there! That's how it works!


14. When this jar of mayo was told the story of the cupboard’s great history, it was only shown pictures of other jars of mayo and their contributions.

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Which seemed completely fine until the other condiments started making a fuss...again.

15. This jar of mayo doesn’t think it’s fair that people talk so much shit about mayo. If people said those things about vinegar or pickle relish, everyone would be so up in arms, but noooo, it's fine if it's about mayo.

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Mayo is actually the most persecuted class of condiment nowadays.

18. This bowl of mayo can totter around completely unaware that it actually is a bowl of mayo.

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Until someone selfishly makes it aware by uttering silly phrases like "check your white privilege". What does that even mean?