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Only Someone Slightly Obsessed With Food Will Have Done 24/32 Of These Things

Food is forever.

Posted on
  1. Tick off all of the things you've done
    Check
    Attended a party just for the food.
    Check
    Left a party early because the food was kind of rubbish.
    Check
    Ignored a phone call because you were eating.
    Check
    Immediately ended a phone call because your food was ready.
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    Eaten while talking on the phone with someone.
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    Refused to share food with a friend.
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    … but happily taken some of your friend's food when offered.
    Check
    Filled up your Instagram with more photos of food than of people.
    Check
    Been more excited by the food in a restaurant than the company you're with.
    Check
    Preferred eating alone rather than with other people.
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    Became annoyed at someone's eating speed.
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    Became annoyed because someone wasn't ready to order their food when you were.
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    Looked up the menu of a restaurant and decided on what you were going to order before you even got there.
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    Been angry because you were hungry.
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    Cried because you were hungry.
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    Been the person at the party spending 90% of it standing by the food table.
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    Labelled your food before putting it in the fridge.
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    Taken someone's food from the fridge without asking.
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    Been the person people go to for restaurant recommendations because of how much you love food.
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    Shouted at someone for taking your food.
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    Eaten last night's leftovers for breakfast.
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    Been more excited about the food you'll get after the club than the actual club itself.
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    Asked someone if they were gonna eat the rest of their food so you could eat it.
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    (Begrudgingly) shared food with someone and been extra aware of just how much more food they were taking than you.
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    Offered someone the last piece of food and instantly regretted it when they took it.
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    Split something in half and purposely given yourself the bigger piece.
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    Watched someone else split something in half with you and scrutinised whether you were given the smaller piece.
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    Danced while eating your favourite food.
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    Refused to eat your food before you found the perfect thing to watch on TV.
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    Genuinely found the sight of melted cheese on a pizza orgasmic.
    Check
    Spent more money of your pay cheque on food than anything else.
    Check
    Gotten hungry for lunch pretty much immediately after finishing breakfast.
 
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