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    Posted on Jan 13, 2015

    50 Hilarious Parks And Rec Quotes In Honor Of The Farewell Season

    In honor of tonight's Parks & Recreation farewell season premiere.

    1. “If there were more food and fewer people, this would be a perfect party.” — Ron Swanson

    NBC / Via tumblr.com

    2. "When April was born I was already in third grade, which means if we were friends back then I would have been hanging out with a baby. I don't know anything about infant care. Oh my god I could have killed her." — Andy Dwyer

    NBC / Via giphy.com

    3. “I don’t want to do things. I want to not do things.” — April Ludgate

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    4. "I also think it's pointless for a human to paint scenes of nature when they can go outside and stand in it." — Ron Swanson

    NBC / Via toptenz.net

    5. "Oh dude, you forgot to put a shirt on. Don't worry I do it all the time." — Andy Dwyer

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    6. “Love…love fades away, but things…things are forever.” — Tom Haverford

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    7. “Guys love it when you can show them you're better than they are at something they love.” — Leslie Knope

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    8. “Ovaries before brovaries.” — Leslie Knope

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    9. “I think Comic Sans always screams FUN.” — Jerry Gergich

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    10. “Sometimes you gotta work a little so you can ball a lot.” — Tom Haverford

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    11. “TREAT YO SELF” — Donna Meagle

    NBC / Via media.giphy.com

    12. “The less I know about other people’s affairs, the happier I am. I’m not interested in caring about people. I once worked with a guy for three years and never learned his name. Best friend I ever had. We still never talk sometimes.” — Ron Swanson

    NBC / Via funnyjunk.com

    13. "Veganism is the sad result of a morally corrupt mind. Reconsider your life." — Ron Swanson

    NBC / Via lh4.ggpht.com

    14. “I love games that turn people against each other.” — April Ludgate

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    15. “When I walked in this morning I saw that the flag was at half mast, I thought, ‘All right, another bureaucrat ate it!’ And then I saw it was Lil’ Sebastian. Half-mast is too high. Show some damn respect.” — Ron Swanson

    NBC / Via tumblr.com

    16. "Warning: high levels of swagger coming through." — Tom Haverford

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    17. “Dude that is the coolest sentence I have ever heard somebody talk. — Andy Dwyer

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    18. "I don't want to paint with a broad brush here, but every single contractor in the world is a miserable, incompetent thief." — Ron Swanson

    View this video on YouTube

    NBC / Via youtube.com

    19. “I hate talking to people about things.” — April Ludgate

    NBC / Via i.imgur.com

    20. "Of all my coworkers he is one of a small number of whom I do not actively root against…uh, there I go again getting all sappy." — Ron Swanson

    NBC / Via i.imgflip.com

    21. "One time I accidentally drank an entire bottle of vinegar. I thought it was terrible wine." — Leslie Knope

    NBC / Via giphy.com

    22. “You may have thought you heard me say I wanted a lot of bacon and eggs, but what I said was: Give me all the bacon and eggs you have.” — Ron Swanson

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    23. “Fishing relaxes me. It’s like yoga, except I still get to kill something.” — Ron Swanson

    NBC / Via pinterest.com

    24. “I don’t even want to be here. The air is too fresh. It’s disgusting. I can’t breathe.” — April Ludgate

    NBC / Via images6.fanpop.com

    25. "When life gives you lemons make lemonade. I read that one on a can of lemonade. I like to think it applies to life." — Andy Dwye

    NBC / Via giphy.com

    26. “We have to remember what’s important in life: friends, waffles, and work. Or waffles, friends, work. But work has to come third.” — Leslie Knope

    NBC / Via easyvegan.info

    27. “There has never been a sadness that can’t be cured by breakfast food.” — Ron Swanson

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    28. "I'm allergic to sushi. Every time I eat more than 80 pieces, I barf." — Andy Dwyer

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    29. "I stand behind my decision to avoid salad and other disgusting things." — Leslie Knope

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    30. “Dress code? Black tie optional. Just like life.” — Tom Haverford

    NBC / Via quickmeme.com

    31. “Just remember every time you look up at the moon, I too will be looking at a moon. Not the same moon, obviously, that’s impossible.” — Andy Dwyer

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    32. "What I hear when I'm being yelled at is people caring loudly at me." — Leslie Knope

    NBC / Via toptenz.net

    33. "Behind every successful man is me, smiling and taking partial credit." — Tom Haverford

    NBC / Via tomhaverfoods.com

    34. “If you ever speak to me in Spanish please use the formal usted.” — April Ludgate

    NBC / Via media.giphy.com

    35. "I don’t care about that prize. But I’m gonna win because I want his happiness to go away.” — April Ludgate

    NBC / Via pinterest.com

    36. “I hope no one minds if I live tweet this bitch.” — Donna Meagle

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    37. “I have never taken the high road. But I tell other people to, ‘cause then there’s more room for me on the low road.” — Tom Haverford

    NBC / Via giphy.com

    38. "The bankrupt government of Pawnee has been shut down all summer so it's been three months of no work, no meetings, no memos, no late nights, nothing. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy." — Leslie Knope

    NBC / Via blogger.com

    39. "Calzones are pointless. They're just pizza that's harder to eat. No one likes them. Good day, sir." — Leslie Knope

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    40. “Yes, I am a hunter and it’s ‘you’ season.” — Donna Meagle

    NBC / Via unboxifyme.com

    41. “I wonder who else was born in Eagleton. Voldemort, probably.” — Leslie Knope

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    42. "Any dog under fifty pounds is a cat and cats are useless.” — Ron Swanson

    NBC / Via weknowmemes.com

    43. “Do you have a first date outfit I could borrow? Like, I don't know a pair of cargo pants?” — Leslie Knope

    NBC / Via wordpress.com

    44. “I call this turf 'n' turf. It's a 16-ounce T-bone and a 24-ounce porterhouse. Also, whisky and a cigar. I am going to consume all of this at once because I am a free American.” — Ron Swanson

    NBC / Via highsteaks.com

    45. “My mom is Puerto Rican. That’s why I’m so lively and colorful.” — April Ludgate

    NBC / Via wordpress.com

    46. “There’s a booth over there selling something called 'fried sausage quilts,' so I’m going to buy the booth.” — Ron Swanson

    NBC / Via media.giphy.com

    47. “I guess some people object to powerful depictions of awesome ladies.” — Leslie Knope

    NBC / Via tumblr.com

    48. I am big enough to admit that I am often inspired by myself.” — Leslie Knope

    NBC / Via blogger.com

    49. "Well I am not usually one for speeches. So, Goodbye.” — Ron Swanson

    NBC / Via pinterest.com

    50. “I love you and I like you.” — Leslie Knope

    NBC / Via blogger.com
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