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1. A penguin humidifier to be your best buddy and destroy the dry office air.
2. A set of sticky notes that won't bring you back to planet earth while you're day dreaming.
3. A pizza plushy babe Emma Stone adores, as shall you.
4. A chic desk organizer for anyone who loses their glasses every three seconds (hi hello me).
5. A very serious mouse pad featuring an animal duo worthy of working hard for.
6. A box of 12 caffeine-infused chocolates so you can indulge your two favorite super healthy work habits all in one go – skipping breakfast, and intaking caffeine.
7. A set of four rollerball pens to start the year off right.
8. A gold photo frame that'll transport you to a ~memorable dimension~ when you need a quick break from your work.
9. A pair of wireless BT headphones to give you the perfect amount of noise reduction for the office – they won't give away your punk phase throwback playlist, and you can still hear necessary things (such as the fire alarm).
10. A mini storm glass barometer for anyone who wants to feel like a magical wizard when predicting ~weather~ or not trash liquid will fall from the sky.
11. A comfy, memory foam chair cushion your butt might never leave.
12. A coloring book so you can start an "in case of emergency" stress relief stash in your filing cabniet.
13. A 50-pack of colored pencils to keep things vibrant when you would rather be asleep at home.
14. And a handy pencil case that'll say it all.
15. A precious llama duster for anyone who misses their cat sitting on their computer while they are at work.
16. A colorful slime babe that'll become your saving grace when you realize you forgot your lunch and need something to squeeze.
17. A laptop stand so you'll have a ~cooler~ computer in 2018, and save valuable desk space.
18. A rainbow tape dispenser here to make all *other* tape seem boring AF.
19. A desk caddy college students and office babes shall adore because it is practical and cute.
20. An automatic sand drawing machine for anyone who wants the "I'm at the spa" feel but doesn't have the time.
21. A mini USB desk fan that'll finally give you an ounce of control over the office temperature.
22. A K-cup organizer so you can make v good use of the filing cabinet under your desk.
23. And a 40 K-cup variety pack that'll probably make you the most popular person at work.
24. A beautiful book filled with the gentle words of Bob Ross to soothe you as you cry from the amount of work you are perishing under.
25. A 30-pack of snacks you'll fill the rest of your filing cabinet with, because what is a desk without a snack stash?
26. An adorable drinking cup for anyone who needs encouragement to drink plenty of water throughout the day.
27. A Shengshou Mirror Cube so you can make your desk look cool, and keep yourself entertained.
28. A daily mood flip chart here to help you achieve full transparency with your colleagues.
29. A monthly-themed set of magnetic memo pads to keep you on track all year long.
30. A unicorn power bank for anyone who is always forgetting their phone charger at home (me).
31. A desk name plate that'll get you through tough times by asking the only question worth asking – WWBD?
32. A Gudetama egg so you can have an apathetic friend to squish and squeeze throughout the day.
33. A four-pack of succulents perfectly sized for your desk.
34. And a precious planter to put your desk plant in, in case your resolution is "be surrounded by cuteness".
35. A cozy cashmere sweater for anyone who gets cold easily, and needs a pullover on standby at all times.
36. A shiny, bright USB drive you can wear as a necklace or hang on the wall by your desk, so you never misplace your drive again.
37. And a monthly subscription box of delish snacks worthy of investing in. May you never run out of healthy goodies again.
Your co-workers trying to infiltrate your super cool desk:
Reviews have been edited for length and/or clarity.