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21 Strange Books You Won't Believe Actually Exist

Well, that looks like an interesting read.

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1. How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack: Defend Yourself When the Lawn Warriors Strike (And They Will)

The author, a gnome defense expert, developed a proven method for protecting yourself against evil garden gnomes. I mean, who doesn't need a lesson in gnome slaying?Get it from Amazon for $11.59+, Barnes & Noble for $11.68+, or a local bookseller through IndieBound.
Ten Speed Press / Via amazon.com

The author, a gnome defense expert, developed a proven method for protecting yourself against evil garden gnomes. I mean, who doesn't need a lesson in gnome slaying?

Get it from Amazon for $11.59+, Barnes & Noble for $11.68+, or a local bookseller through IndieBound.

2. Goblinproofing One's Chicken Coop: And Other Practical Advice in Our Campaign Against the Fairy Kingdom

This is a complete guide that teaches you how to protect your chicken coop from goblins, dwarves, flower fairies, and other creatures from the fairy realm. It's a must-have.Get it from Amazon for $12.19+, from Barnes & Noble for $12.96+, or a local bookseller through IndieBound.
Conari Press / Via amazon.com

This is a complete guide that teaches you how to protect your chicken coop from goblins, dwarves, flower fairies, and other creatures from the fairy realm. It's a must-have.

Get it from Amazon for $12.19+, from Barnes & Noble for $12.96+, or a local bookseller through IndieBound.

3. Extreme Ironing

This book combines the thrill of outdoor rock climbing with the satisfaction of well-ironed clothes. A match made in heaven!Get it from Amazon for $6.47+, or from Barnes & Noble for $11.10+.
New Holland Books / Via amazon.com

This book combines the thrill of outdoor rock climbing with the satisfaction of well-ironed clothes. A match made in heaven!

Get it from Amazon for $6.47+, or from Barnes & Noble for $11.10+.

4. Knitting With Dog Hair: Better a Sweater From a Dog You Know and Love Than From a Sheep You'll Never Meet

From mittens to caps, this how-to guide shares how you can turn your dogs soft hair into warm and cozy knits! Who wouldn't love to wear their dog's hair?!Get it from Amazon for $24.65+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.
St. Martin's Griffin / Via amazon.com

From mittens to caps, this how-to guide shares how you can turn your dogs soft hair into warm and cozy knits! Who wouldn't love to wear their dog's hair?!

Get it from Amazon for $24.65+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.

5. Crafting With Cat Hair

For the feline lovers, this how-to guide shares a ton of cat craft ideas! Love your cat? Make a tote bag, finger puppet, fluffy cat toy, picture frame, and more with their fur!Get it from Amazon for $12.86+, from Barnes & Noble for $13.18+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.
Quirk Books / Via amazon.com

For the feline lovers, this how-to guide shares a ton of cat craft ideas! Love your cat? Make a tote bag, finger puppet, fluffy cat toy, picture frame, and more with their fur!

Get it from Amazon for $12.86+, from Barnes & Noble for $13.18+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.

6. Images You Should Not Masturbate To

This odd and interesting photo book is a collection of "mood-killing" images that are sure to dampen the urge...if you know what I mean.Get it from Amazon for $9.95+, from Barnes & Noble for $9.95+, or from your local bookseller from IndieBound.
TarcherPerigee / Via amazon.com

This odd and interesting photo book is a collection of "mood-killing" images that are sure to dampen the urge...if you know what I mean.

Get it from Amazon for $9.95+, from Barnes & Noble for $9.95+, or from your local bookseller from IndieBound.

7. Old Tractors and the Men Who Love Them: How to Keep Your Tractors Happy and Your Family Running

From one tractor lover to another, the author shares his years of wisdom and love for his tractor. Who needs the love of a woman when you have the love of a tractor?Get it from Amazon for $5.46+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.
MBI / Via amazon.com

From one tractor lover to another, the author shares his years of wisdom and love for his tractor. Who needs the love of a woman when you have the love of a tractor?

Get it from Amazon for $5.46+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.

8. Everything I Know About Women I Learned From My Tractor

Rogers back! And this time, the author shares stories about everything from first dates to anniversary presents to keeping it real in the bedroom. I'm hooked!Get it from Amazon for $18.33+, from Barnes & Noble for $14.95+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.
MBI / Via amazon.com

Rogers back! And this time, the author shares stories about everything from first dates to anniversary presents to keeping it real in the bedroom. I'm hooked!

Get it from Amazon for $18.33+, from Barnes & Noble for $14.95+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.

9. Still Stripping After 25 Years

Straight from the expert, this informative book contains step-by-step, illustrated directions on stripping! That's quilt stripping, of course!Get it from Amazon for $16.36+, from Barnes & Noble for $27.95+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.
Quilt In A Day / Via amazon.com

Straight from the expert, this informative book contains step-by-step, illustrated directions on stripping! That's quilt stripping, of course!

Get it from Amazon for $16.36+, from Barnes & Noble for $27.95+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.

10. How to Poo on a Date: The Lovers' Guide to Toilet Etiquette

Have you ever been on a date and had to poo? Then this book is for you! This toilet etiquette book can be used for all socially awkward occasions. Get it from Amazon for $17.19+, from Barnes & Noble for $9.95+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.
Prion / Via amazon.com

Have you ever been on a date and had to poo? Then this book is for you! This toilet etiquette book can be used for all socially awkward occasions.

Get it from Amazon for $17.19+, from Barnes & Noble for $9.95+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.

11. How to Shit in the Woods

Another book about poo! Being outside is relaxing — until nature calls, that is. Find out the best and most efficient ways to poop in the wild with this how-to guide.Get it from Amazon for $11.99+, from Barnes & Noble for $11.99+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.
Ten Speed Press / Via amazon.com

Another book about poo! Being outside is relaxing — until nature calls, that is. Find out the best and most efficient ways to poop in the wild with this how-to guide.

Get it from Amazon for $11.99+, from Barnes & Noble for $11.99+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.

12. Manifold Destiny: The One! The Only! Guide to Cooking on Your Car Engine!

Cooking on the grill is so last year. Learn how you can travel and cook at the same time by using your engine to whip up steak, chicken, and so much more!Get it from Amazon for $9.98+, from Barnes & Noble for $11.40+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.
Simon & Schuster / Via amazon.com

Cooking on the grill is so last year. Learn how you can travel and cook at the same time by using your engine to whip up steak, chicken, and so much more!

Get it from Amazon for $9.98+, from Barnes & Noble for $11.40+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.

13. Book of the Bitch: A Complete Guide to Understanding and Caring for Bitches

This how-to guide details all the responsibilities and essentials for owning a female dog. Exactly what you thought, right?Get it from Amazon for $10.71+, or from Barnes & Noble for $14.99+.
Ringpress Books Ltd / Via amazon.com

This how-to guide details all the responsibilities and essentials for owning a female dog. Exactly what you thought, right?

Get it from Amazon for $10.71+, or from Barnes & Noble for $14.99+.

14. The Stray Shopping Carts of Eastern North America: A Guide to Field Identification

Ever wonder how shopping carts end up in random places? This book discusses the classification system of wild carts and photodocuments the crazy places they end up.Get it from Amazon for $52.00+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.
Harry N. Abrams / Via amazon.com

Ever wonder how shopping carts end up in random places? This book discusses the classification system of wild carts and photodocuments the crazy places they end up.

Get it from Amazon for $52.00+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.

15. Why Cats Paint: A Theory of Feline Aesthetics

This book discusses the theory of feline art and why so many cats are painting these days. Their purr-fect paintings will leave you impressed and tickled with joy.Get it from Amazon for $14.46+, from Barnes & Noble for $9.95+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.
Ten Speed Press / Via amazon.com

This book discusses the theory of feline art and why so many cats are painting these days. Their purr-fect paintings will leave you impressed and tickled with joy.

Get it from Amazon for $14.46+, from Barnes & Noble for $9.95+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.

16. Snake Eyes: A Nicolas Cage Activity Book

This fun activity book is a collection of puzzles, games, and coloring pages inspired by none other than THE Nicholas Cage himself. He's lurking around every page.Get it from Amazon for $10.69+, from Barnes & Noble for $11.23+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.
Belly Kids / Via amazon.com

This fun activity book is a collection of puzzles, games, and coloring pages inspired by none other than THE Nicholas Cage himself. He's lurking around every page.

Get it from Amazon for $10.69+, from Barnes & Noble for $11.23+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.

17. Fifty Shades of Chicken

This cookbook follows Miss Chicken, a young free-range bird, on her journey to sultry dinner dish. Christian Grey would totally leave Anastasia for Miss Chicken.Get it from Amazon for $11.81+, from Barnes & Noble for $12.89+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.
Clarkson Potter / Via amazon.com

This cookbook follows Miss Chicken, a young free-range bird, on her journey to sultry dinner dish. Christian Grey would totally leave Anastasia for Miss Chicken.

Get it from Amazon for $11.81+, from Barnes & Noble for $12.89+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.

18. Whose Bottom?

Flip books have never been more fun than when you're looking at bums. Learn about animals in a new, hip way.Get it from Amazon for $2.97.
Ladybird Books Ltd / Via amazon.com

Flip books have never been more fun than when you're looking at bums. Learn about animals in a new, hip way.

Get it from Amazon for $2.97.

19. How to Live With a Huge Penis: Advice, Meditations, and Wisdom for Men Who Have Too Much

It's tough having a massive penis. This how-to guide provides valuable and necessary advice on dealing with that pesky giant. Get it from Amazon for $7.99+, from Barnes & Noble for $10.91+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.
Quirk Books / Via amazon.com

It's tough having a massive penis. This how-to guide provides valuable and necessary advice on dealing with that pesky giant.

Get it from Amazon for $7.99+, from Barnes & Noble for $10.91+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.

20. I Could Pee on This: And Other Poems by Cats

Cats basically rule the world. This book contains many poems about why cats do the things that do in a way us ignorant humans will understand. Get it from Amazon for $7.99+, from Barnes & Noble for $9.51+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.
Chronicle Books LLC / Via amazon.com

Cats basically rule the world. This book contains many poems about why cats do the things that do in a way us ignorant humans will understand.

Get it from Amazon for $7.99+, from Barnes & Noble for $9.51+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.

21. Finally, The Long Journey of Mr. Poop

Ever wondered where your poop comes from? This adorable and educational book takes you on the same journey your poop travels before it exits your body and enters the world. Get it from Amazon for $22.63+, from Barnes & Noble for $12.15+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.
Cinco Puntos Press / Via amazon.com

Ever wondered where your poop comes from? This adorable and educational book takes you on the same journey your poop travels before it exits your body and enters the world.

Get it from Amazon for $22.63+, from Barnes & Noble for $12.15+, or from your local bookseller through IndieBound.