25 Things That Are Guaranteed To Happen When You Own A Cat
"That's OK, I didn't want that glass of water anyway. That can be your drinkie now, kitty."
You will lose your cat for several hours and panic, before finding them at the back of the wardrobe.
At first you will try to stop your cat destroying your furniture, but eventually you will realise that some territory will have to be surrendered.
You will call your cat many names, but rarely the name you actually gave them.
You will lose a lot of sleep.
You will learn to hide certain objects from your cat.
You will spend money on your cat because you just want to show them love, but they will not care.
You will get bitten, scratched, and generally abused.
You will get used to watching only half the TV.
You will learn to sleep with your toes inside the covers.
Your phone will run out of memory.
Your cat will train you more than you will train your cat.
You will sit for ages with a dead leg, needing a wee, because you couldn't possibly disturb your cat.
You will learn to get a bit more relaxed about "personal space".
You will learn to defend every meal you eat.
You will never leave a glass dangerously near the edge of a surface again.
Your cat will spend some time removing all of the cat litter from their tray.
You will hold your cat up to the mirror just so they can see how beautiful they are.
You will see a box or a large elastic band and think, My cat would love that.
Your cat will stare at you and you'll wonder if they're going to murder you in your sleep.
You will not blink when your cat decides to do their daily sprints around the house.
You will surrender cups of tea and turn on taps because your cat has decided that they don't like to drink water out of a bowl.
You will cancel plans to be ignored by your cat all evening.
You will love like you've never loved before.
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