1. Going out:
Lesbian nights are hard to find and are usually in a small basement.

There are three types of gay nights out: the “let’s vogue to Madonna and Cher” night out, the “did you know there’s a dark room here?” night out, and the “no, lady, I will not be your gay best friend” night out.
2. Dating:
Finding a lesbian who you fancy, you haven't already slept with, and your ex hasn't slept with is near impossible.

There are six degrees of separation when dating as a gay man.
3. Dating apps:
The dating app world is pretty bleak for lesbians. Tinder is full of men asking for threesomes, and HER is (you've guessed it) full of your exes.

Grindr is the darkest of rabbit holes where gay men forget every ounce of etiquette and home training.
I'll have a quick look on Grindr, see if anyone has messaged me...💀
4. PDA:
If two lesbians kiss in public there will be a straight man who will assume you’re putting on a show just for him.
The first time a gay couple kiss in public, there's usually a clash of teeth and heads because they want to get it over with so nobody else sees.
5. Stereotypes:
The first thing your mum probably said to you when you came out was “Please don’t cut your hair.”
Of course every gay man loves Madonna, glitter, and every musical ever made. Sports? Ew.
6. Tribes:
There are two types of lesbian: cat lesbians and dog lesbians.
Bears, otters, cubs: Gays have officially ruined the animal kingdom for everybody.
7. Relationships:
The U-haul stereotype is sadly true: Most lesbians really aren't scared of commitment.
Gay relationships tend to be splashed all over social media under hashtags that include "the boy".
You can tell when a couple have broken up because they suddenly stop posting about each other every day. Successful relationships are usually kept separate from social media.