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10 Steps To Get The Perfect Nudes

It's all about setting the scene.

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1. The first step is to take off those pesky clothes.

Flo Perry / BuzzFeed

Obviously you have to be nude to take a good nude.

2. The next step is to get yourself in a flattering position that really shows off the bits you don't usually show off.

Your genitals should really be the star of the show.
Flo Perry / BuzzFeed

Your genitals should really be the star of the show.

3. Look around your home for some sexy household objects and use them to cover up any bits that don't look like they belong to Kim Kardashian.

Got a weird mole? Hide that mole with a posh iron!
Flo Perry / BuzzFeed

Got a weird mole? Hide that mole with a posh iron!

4. Lighting is of the utmost importance: You must have sexy lighting.

Ideally you should shine a spotlight on your rude bits.
Flo Perry / BuzzFeed

Ideally you should shine a spotlight on your rude bits.

5. If in doubt about what lighting is sexy, just think dark.

Flo Perry / BuzzFeed

6. You can't really go too dark!

Even if the nude recipient can't see any genitals, the dark will let them know they are there.
Flo Perry / BuzzFeed

Even if the nude recipient can't see any genitals, the dark will let them know they are there.

7. Once you've got the lighting down it's important to set the scene.

Surround yourself with objects that reflect your wild side. Pets show you can tame wild beasts, while swimming goggles show you are ready to tackle the elements.
Flo Perry / BuzzFeed

Surround yourself with objects that reflect your wild side. Pets show you can tame wild beasts, while swimming goggles show you are ready to tackle the elements.

8. Now if you've followed all the steps correctly you should have a sexy-looking nude just like this!

If you haven't tamed your wild beast correctly they may sink their claws into your naked flesh.
Flo Perry / BuzzFeed

If you haven't tamed your wild beast correctly they may sink their claws into your naked flesh.

9. If you're not happy with the final result, resist the urge to edit and instead draw an impressionist portrait.

Editing in Photoshop is deceptive, while drawing for your recipient will show off your talents and they will be impressed by your understanding of early 20th-century art.
Flo Perry / BuzzFeed

Editing in Photoshop is deceptive, while drawing for your recipient will show off your talents and they will be impressed by your understanding of early 20th-century art.

10. Or maybe you should just ignore all of this and do whatever you want.

You can even keep your clothes on!
Flo Perry / BuzzFeed

You can even keep your clothes on!