Let's face it, friends. Dating is not easy! If you're single (like me), I'm sure you have experienced the bizarre world of dating apps or know how difficult it can be to connect with a stranger at a loud bar.
Regardless of how tricky navigating single life can be, it shouldn't stop you (or any of us) from taking a risk and putting yourself out there, aka ~shooting your shot~ with someone you're interested in. I was curious to hear about the dating trials and tribulations of the BuzzFeed Community, so I asked if anyone has shot their shot with a crush or an attractive stranger and if so, how did it go?
All I can say is that I appreciated how honest the responses were and if anything, it inspired me to take more risks in my love life!
Here are some of the responses.
1. "During a work training session that was a week long over WebEx, everyone was introducing themselves. A beautiful woman with a lovely smile and laugh had a Beetlejuice shirt in her background. It's one of my favorite movies. Utter classic. I sent her a private message telling her I love Beetlejuice and I like that shirt. She replied back that she made it. I responded with, 'When are you going to make me one?' She laughed and we now have been together for six months. The relationship is doing tremendously great. Go for it, folks. Closed mouths do not get fed. We live once."
2. "Guy here. I let a girl know I was interested and she seemed suspicious so I got my exes and my exes' best friends to write me letters of recommendation, along with a letter from the dean of my undergrad college who had once expelled me. I was over 30 at the time. It was supposed to come across like a joke and everyone had a blast doing it. And it worked!"
3. "There's a Subway inside the Walmart by me. Recently, while placing my order, I had a brief exchange with the guy in line behind me. He seemed nice, so after I paid for my food, I said that I hadn't done my shopping yet and asked whether he had. He said no, so I asked if he'd to join me and shop together."
"Walking the aisles of Walmart may sound trashy, but it was actually really nice because we were able to learn each other’s opinions on food, money habits, and household management and I could see how he reacted to someone disagreeing with him on things. (Important!)
Most of all, I didn't feel scared that he might turn into a crazy stalker because we were in a crowded store during the middle of the day and he didn't have any contact information until I felt comfortable enough to share it after about an hour of chatting. We ended up not being compatible later, but he was a nice guy, and I like how organically things started between us. I'm glad I reached out and tried!"
4. "I have shot my shot a few times, both in person and online, with different levels of rejection."
5. "I'm a guy, and I’ve liked this other guy for quite awhile now but had almost given up on him and admitted to myself he was straight. A couple weeks ago, at the start of Thanksgiving break, my friend convinced me to text him."
"I thought it was the perfect time because if he shot me down, we wouldn’t see each other for awhile anyway. I texted him and told him I liked him and he responded a few hours later. He was very nice about it and said he was flattered but also straight and that things wouldn’t change between us. Things did change though, and now things are very, very awkward between us. But I honestly don’t regret what I did. I think it was good for me."
6. "I was out with friends at a bar and we met a couple of attractive guys. My friend was clearly interested in one of them, and I found the other pretty cute. They start telling us about themselves and the one I'm into says he is from Brazil."
"Now, I don't know what came over me, but the next thing I knew I told him "You know, I've never made out with a Brazilian guy before." He had an excited, shocked look on his face. He grabbed my hand and we went out back behind the bar and started making out. We hung out a few times after that, but nothing more. It was still a fun time and a fun story! Not the only time I 'shot my shot,' though it was probably the most blunt, bold experience."
7. "Several years ago when I was on a dating app, I would get a decent amount of messages that would take up my time."
8. "I met a guy at my friend’s wedding last year and we really hit it off. I’m talking similar interests, same sense of humor, literally the male version of myself. We danced together the entire night and he would wait in line with me at the bar so I wasn’t alone."
"About a week or two later I messaged him attempting to 'shoot my shot,' but I only got boring, one word responses from him in return. I was disappointed and confused because it seemed so obvious that the feeling was mutual! I later found out from a friend that in the time it took for me to make the decision to shoot my shot, he had started seeing someone else. They’re no longer together but I’m too embarrassed to reach out a second time."
9. "I contemplated it for a week or so. Then I finally worked up the courage to ask him (my crush) out on a random Tuesday. I told him that I liked him and he was pretty surprised."
10. "My good friend and I instantly clicked when we met, but not in a romantic way. We became really good friends and even dated other people during our friendship without things being awkward or weird. Until one day I found myself getting jealous when I saw him talking to another girl and I realized, 'Oops, I caught feelings.'"
"A few weeks after this, we got drunk on Moscow mules at his place and when we were watching 'Lucifer,' I just leaned close to him and when he didn't pull away, I kissed him. I may have made the first move, but he was the first to tell me he loved me. We've been together for 2.5 years and there's truly nothing better than falling in love with your best friend."
11. "After six months of training with him, I told my personal trainer I was getting divorced and I hadn't had sex in 18 months. He turned to look at me thinking, 'What the fuck did you just say?' He was totally stunned. It turned out he was interested in ME too, but because I was married he didn't say anything. That was 4.5 years ago. We've been dating since then and are due to get married next year."
12. "I was dating his roommate for a couple months and whenever I would visit, we ended up hanging out because the guy I was seeing would bail. I didn’t realize I had a major crush on him until after his roommate and I broke up and a friend pointed it out to me."
"I had never made the first move before and I didn’t even know if he liked me but we always had so much fun together so I took a chance and asked if he wanted to go out with me sometime. To my amazement, he said yes. Our first date was him coming to my apartment and making dinner together and we’ve been inseparable ever since. He moved in two weeks after our first date, we got married the following year and our son was born this August. We’ve known each other 4.5 years total and have been married 2.5 of those years. My husband eventually admitted he had a crush on me since the moment we met but never would have made a move. Taking the risk was so worth it."
13. "We when we were 18 through mutual friends and we stayed friends — but I had always had a crush on him. It was completely harmless and I never did anything or cheated, but that crush still lingered. When I was 24, I broke it off with a boyfriend and just thought, 'Why the hell not?'"
14. "I've shot my shot in person and I cringe when I think about it. He worked at a local shop and I used to go in a few times a week. We usually chatted and said hi to one another. One day I decided to ask if he wanted to go for a drink. He replied that he was engaged but thanked me anyway. So awkward! I went in a few times after, but it was strange."
15. "It was during Thanksgiving weekend. I saw her sitting alone and thought 'Wow, she's gorgeous.' But I had just finished singing and my voice was gone. I approached and waved to her. I then proceeded to write on my phone's notes app, explaining that I had lost my voice. She started to type on her phone to respond to me."
16. "I met him in college. We were both in choir — he was a bass, I was a soprano. I flirted shamelessly with him, making it very clear that I was attracted to him. We went to a dance together where we had a conversation about my feelings for him. He reciprocated and we just celebrated our second wedding anniversary. Shoot your shot, kids!"
17. "I once sent a drink to a sexy, fine man while in a hotel bar while I was watching the Warriors game in Los Angeles. He was really impressed and came to my table because somehow he figured out it was me. Well, this led to a three-year affair with him. It was probably the best thing I ever did in life because after getting divorced after a 40-year marriage, it let me know that this old girl still had it."
18. "I’ve shot my shot in the past, but in February I met a (very) attractive girl at work. She and I got to talking and it was awesome. She was very easy to talk to, very personable, and inviting. Of course, things did not go as planned, as she was already in a committed relationship, and I am not about that home-wrecking life. She took another job in late April and I haven’t seen her since, but that hurt for a while."
19. "Yes. It was a brother of a friend and we got along great. Whenever we would hang out we were always laughing, talking, and the sex was amazing as well. After several weeks, I started liking him more and I thought 'What the heck, why not?' so I asked him to be my boyfriend. I texted, 'Hey, I know we have a great time together and we have great conversations. How about we make things more serious?' And he never replied. I actually never heard from him again after that. It sucked because I was expecting a completely different response and I really liked him but I wish him the best."
20. "I shot my shot with a guy I worked with my senior year of college. I was graduating soon and knew it would be the last time I’d ever see him, so I just gave him my number and walked away. I’m happy to say, he did call, and we are getting married next year!"
21. "I have shot my shot before but each time I've been rejected. I have never had a boyfriend before, and in the two-three times I've confessed my feelings to men, they have not once returned said feelings. Don't let that discourage you! If you like someone, it's worth the gamble."
22. "I was on Plenty of Fish, scrolling through the profiles, and I came across this cute firefighter. I reached out to him, we had an amazing first few dates, which turned into an actual relationship."
"A few months later, he started pulling away, which I realized was because he was starting to really fall for me. It had just been him and his daughter for 12 years and I think he was afraid of being with someone would change his life too much. The old me would have just walked away, but I knew he was a really good man so I gently, but persistently, pursued him. Texts, phone calls, sexy pics. Eventually, he asked me to move in with him and his daughter — and it’s been almost two years since then. I’m so glad I stepped out of my comfort zone."
23. "I fell hard for a co-worker six years ago. I knew she had a boyfriend, but I had to 'shoot my shot' and tell her how I felt, as I can be painfully shy around attractive women. I have a habit of clamming up and never acting on my romantic feelings out of fear of rejection. So I worked up the courage and told her. She responded much as I had expected, telling me that she had a boyfriend and just wanted to be friends. It devastated me."
24. "I wasn't always happy with being single but in my late 20s, I worked on myself and got to a place in life where I was good being single. I got asked out from time to time, went on dates from time to time. It was fun but ultimately wasn't attracted to anyone enough to make anything serious. I did have a strong crush on one of my co-workers, though."
"He was just so attractive to me in a way that I hadn't felt in anyone else ever. Now, I've never been the type to be bold or forward. I grew up with the mentality that women shouldn't make the first move.
I don't know what came over me, but I decided to tell him one day after work that I thought he was cute and interesting and he should ask me out sometime. I honestly felt proud of myself and was good with whatever outcome. It took him a few months to properly ask me out but he later admitted that he was both impressed and intimidated by my confidence in the best way possible. Even though I had given him the free pass it had taken him a bit of time to 'grow the balls to ask out a girl like me' for fear he would mess it up. Well, I am very happy to have shot my shot. I love him and he loves me. We're set to be married in the spring and this time he was the one who proposed."
25. "This was a long time ago. I saw a very cute guy at a concert, but this other guy was really bothering me, and I wasn't interested at all. so I went up to the cute guy and asked him to pretend to be my boyfriend to get rid of the annoying guy. He bought me a drink, we hung out all evening, and had a little make-out session after the concert. I would say it worked out well. We talked a few times afterwards, but it turns out he lived significantly far away from me so nothing came of it really, but it is a very good memory of mine."
26. "I did at a bar yesterday, actually. I saw this very attractive person, I went up to her with my friends around and said 'Hey, I find you very cute. Is it okay if I get your number?'. She responded that she doesn’t give her number out to guys randomly, but maybe if we knew each other she would. After a little talking she said she needed to leave and she would visit me at my table later. She didn’t and I didn’t get the number. However, sometimes you’ve gotta make the move."
27. "I was having drinks with a platonic college friend I knew for a few months. I decided I liked him romantically that night and slid into a booth beside him bumping into him. He knew then that I liked him. We'll be married 14 years this month."