1. How to pay my taxes.
2. How to get good credit.
3. What to say when someone in a job interview asks, "So tell me about yourself."
4. How to ask for a raise.
5. How to go to work every single day at the same time and never be late.
6. How to act normal at work after a long night of drinking.
7. How to find an apartment with normal roommates.
8. What to respond to people when they say, "So you do what for a living?"
9. How to be prepared for the real world.
10. How to deal when you get home from a long day of work and remember you need to do your laundry.
11. How to respond to my boss emailing me at midnight.
12. How to not spend my entire paycheck.
13. How to cope when I finally realize my entire 4 years of college was a waste of time.
14. So, in conclusion, thanks college. For making it seem that when I graduated, the world would care that I got an A in Earth Science.
15. ...but it would have been great if at least one person told me that I would mostly be using Excel — for the next year of my life.
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