1.
currently texting 'Happy Father's Day' to all the men in my phone to freak them out
2.
Every day is Father's Day in my jeans.
3.
Father's Day is just a ploy by big business to get you to buy more fathers.
4.
Last minute Father's Day gift idea: You bother to call him
5.
Father's Day Fun: 1) Walk up to a complete stranger at lunch with his family. 2) Hug him. 3) Tell him 'Happy Father's Day dad'! 4) Run.
6.
7.
Every Father's Day at midnight the HomeDepot dads and the Lowe's dads rumble "Westside Story" style in a neutral Costcos parking lot.
8.
Father's Day is the day you get to find out which of your friends still call him "Daddy"
9.
I can't figure out what to get my priest for Father's Day.
10.
If we all shut up about it, dads wouldn't even remember it's Father's Day and we could totally get out of having to do it.
11.
Father's Day card 1st draft: Father's Day card final draft: Hey.
12.
Every time a thermostat is adjusted a dad somewhere dies a little inside. Keep this in mind this Father's Day. ~Inspirational
13.
I don't care what my kids get me for Father's Day as long as it's a hammock
14.
Hope I can find a Father’s Day card at the store that makes reference to farts and/or watching sports!
15.
[Dads Anonymous meeting] DAD: Hi everyone, I'm new here DADS: Hi, new here, we're dads! *universe implodes*
16.
Tomorrow is Father's Dad, so don't forget to get your dad a better dad than the one he had
17.
Me: "hey dad happy fathers day" Dad: "not good enough"