For Everyone Who Isn't Making Any New Year's Resolutions
Avoid the gym at all costs.
You've heard this garbage for far too long:
And the fact that your Facebook timeline is totally overrun with these updates is...annoying.
While everyone is working on their goals, you're just working on your TV lineup.
And you're not about to start changing just because it's a new year.
You firmly believe that if someone does make a resolution, it has to be realistic.
Because you know that anyone who actually bothers to make a resolution will likely fall into this trap:
Oh, you're not afraid of a diet, but your definition is a little different from everyone else's.
Whenever someone starts talking about their resolutions, you usually have some suggestions for them.
You already know which of your friends isn't going to stick to their plans.
And you know to avoid the gym at all costs in January.
Because it's going to be crowded AF with all those goal setters.
When it comes to important things, you know what's truly worth making an effort for:
And while everyone is starting a new diet, you're just over here trying to live your best life.
So you're opting out of the whole resolutions thing because you don't want to be part of the problem.
Plus, you already have goals in life and you know exactly how to achieve them.
So stay strong, people who aren't making resolutions, this time shall pass.
Well, that is, until 2017 rolls around...
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