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26 Reasons Why "The Following" Has The Sexiest Serial Killer On TV

Yes, I'm saying it: Joe Carroll is a sexy serial killer.

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1. Everyone, this is Joe Carroll from The Following. Joe, say hello to everyone!

[Insert British accent here.]
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[Insert British accent here.]

2. In the spirit of full disclosure—you may want to sit down for this—Joe's a serial killer.

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Sorry.

3. But, like, a pretty hot one, right?

4. Yes, I know, the man kills people.

5. And he's got that weird obsession with Edgar Allan Poe.

Quoth the Raven: Get a new muse!
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Quoth the Raven: Get a new muse!

6. But he's also a scholarly professor!

7. Hot for teacher, anyone?!

8. And orange is an oddly flattering color on him.

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Prison orange, to be specific.

9. Plus, he's not afraid to role-play!

10. Or wear cardigans!

11. Or drink!

12. Dang boo, you need me to fill up that glass or what?

Danggg.

13. Sometimes he cheats on his wife*.

*Who's technically his ex-wife, but that's just semantics, really.
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*Who's technically his ex-wife, but that's just semantics, really.

14. And it's pretty sexy, actually.

15. OK, more than sexy.

16. ALRIGHT, I'M ABOUT TO BLACKOUT SO SOMEONE CALL 9-1-1.

17. Other times, he and K-Bacon eye fuck the hell out of each other.

18. And yes, I realize that he is STILL a serial killer.

Who sometimes likes to keep creepy souvenirs from his victims.

19. Who's cultivating a following of other killers for terrifying things.

His followers are pretty hot too. Just saying.

20. But just look at that face!

21. All Joe wants is someone to love...

And choke to death...

22. And someone to kill.

23. Because deep down, Joe is a man who genuinely cares...

24. ...about killing.

25. And looking fresh to death while he does it.

No pun intended!
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No pun intended!

26. So, what do you say, will you join Joe's following of fans?

If for no other reason than the man is undeniably hot. And he'll probs kill you if you don't agree. It's a safety issue, really.
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If for no other reason than the man is undeniably hot. And he'll probs kill you if you don't agree. It's a safety issue, really.