back to top

21 Things Americans Learned From An Afternoon Of High Tea

Wear stretchy pants.

Posted on

Erin and Leo, two Americans spending a week in London, decided to do the most English thing we could think of: an afternoon of high tea.

Comedy Central

We went to Fortnum & Mason, a really ~fancy~ department store in London that also has a truly beautiful tea room. This is what we learned:

1. It’s surprisingly OK to wear jeans to tea.

We were a bit worried that "high tea" meant "fancy schmancy dress code," but several other people were indeed wearing casual clothes.


3. You can apparently have alcohol at tea time.

It's not a strictly tea-only deal. We really made a huge mistake not choosing this option.

6. Maybe avoid ordering the novelty teas, like the "Wedding Breakfast Blend" in honor of Prince William and Kate Middleton. It's embarrassing.

And after you drink it, it means you're married! (OK, made that last part up...)


7. The tiers of cakes and goodies are so perfect, for a minute you think they almost look fake.

Literally just like American Girl doll accessories.

10. It’s OK to take photos because literally everyone else is a tourist.


It would seem proper etiquette to keep one's phone stored for the duration of high tea, but a lot of people were snapping pics.


16. You should save room for the cake cart.

Cake is the last part of tea...if you can make it to that point.

17. If you try to finish your entire pot of tea, you’ll be spinning in caffeine circles soon after.

That pot is A LOT of tea.

18. You will be tempted to steal the tiny servings of jam and pastries. Probably don’t?

Those little jars are just too cute.

21. Then you'll leave afternoon tea and realize that, while you don't regret everything you ate/drank, it's best to wear comfy clothes next time.


The jeans, with their buttons and zippers, were a huge mistake in hindsight. But it was worth every bite of those scones.