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Cashews Look Just Like Apples When They're Growing

I'm upset.

QUICK. Close your eyes and think of a cashew.

Erin Chack, a literal photoshop god

Did you imagine one of these tiny wooden bananas? Then good! You know what a cashew is.

Prasongtakham / Getty Images


It turns out that cashews don't just spontaneously appear on the earth's surface. They grow! (Duh.)

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And apparently they look like an old man's untanned elbow skin close up. Yeck.

But before I show you how they grow I need you to look at these puppies and remember a time when the world was good and pure.

Tzahiv / Getty Images

Look at these three furry angels. I want to roll them back and forth under my bare feet.

OK, TAKE A DEPP BREATH! THIS is how cashews grow:

Daniellauziere / Getty Images

A pear with a dingleberry, tell me not (!!!).

Please observe the two parts: the cashew apple (the fruity, colorful part) and the cashew nut (still encased in the shell).

Getty / bannerwega

If you're thinking that looks like a kidney bean hot glued to a bell pepper, 1) same, 2) I swear there's a cashew in there somewhere. And I'll prove it!

First, you pick the entire fruit 'n' nut combo.

I just screamed, "A-DOY!" so loud my cat ran out of the room.

Then you remove the nut from the fruit.

Am I blowing your mind?

AND THEN THINGS START GETTING WACKY. The nuts are dried, steamed, and then hand-cracked.

Every cashew you've ever eaten has been fondled by a very dexterous stranger. WE ARE ALL CONNECTED.

Then ever-so-gingerly the nut meat is removed from the shell.

So much work for a lil' nut!

And then there's this whole sorting process I'm not going to get into because I know you have a family and a life.

But basically cashews are TEDIOUS. I am exhausted just from writing this.

Back to the appley part, though. Yes, you can eat it. But it's better used in juices, jams, and chutneys since the flesh is kind of bitter and runny.


  1. Cashew outside?

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Cashew outside?
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H/T to this rad vid I found. And if there's something else I should learn, LEAVE SOME (NICE) COMMENTS!