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18 Things New Jersey Is Fully Responsible For


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Historically, New Jersey has gotten a bad rap.

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So I am here to remind you that New Jersey has a lot of things to offer the world. A LOT.

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Who else would give homes to so many orphaned Oscars? The woman is a modern day saint.

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2. And man on the FRICKIN' moon BUZZ ALDRIN.

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He walked on the moon's FACE.

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3. I shouldn't have to even remind you of this, but we gave the world LIGHT BULBS.

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How would you know you were having a good idea if it wasn't for New Jersey?

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4. And SHAQ! Who doesn't love good ol' Shaquille O'Neal?

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This perfect GIF wouldn't exist without the Garden State. *Cough* Neither would the Lakers' championship rings *cough cough*

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5. Your cousin Vinny — aka JOE freaking PESCI — is from New Jersey.

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Try to imagine a world without Joe Pesci in it. YA JUST CAN'T.

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6. We gave you guys CAMPBELL'S SOUP, the most iconic soup there is, ever was, and will ever be.

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Andy Warhol owes his entire career to New Jersey. Without it, he BARELY EXISTS. Just some hipster! A nobody!

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7. Ever heard of a little boy band called the JONAS BROTHERS?

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OK, so they weren't great, but Nick Jonas's arms are!!!

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8. DANNY DEVITO is from New Jersey!

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And so is his troll foot!

9. We also gave the world BUBBLE WRAP, your own plastic therapist and protector of Precious Moments™️ statuettes.

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The most important six-second video of all time is nothing without bubble wrap (and Jers)!

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10. Do I even have to speak his name aloud? Jersey's one true king? Our collective dad and savior?

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And the subject of my most frequent Google Image search: "Bruce Springsteen beach photos" (HE WAS BORN IN THE 1940s, YOU GUYS, IT MAKES NO SENSE!).


11. And here's our Queen!!! LATIFAH.

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We are her loyal subjects and would lay our bodies down to defend her.

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12. SALT WATER TAFFY is from New Jersey! Wooo, baby!

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Whatever, your grandma loves it.

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13. JACK ANTONOFF hails from EnJay (that's a new nickname I'm workshopping).

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Listen, if you like current pop music, you like Jack Antonoff. And you like JERSEY, BABY. 💪

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14. MARTHA STEWART, your favorite white collar criminal, is from Dirty Jersey.

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And without Martha we woudn't have Martha and Snoop Dogg's incredible friendship.

This is an original Snoop Dogg painting, and Snoop gave it to me as a gift! Very nice, don't you think?

15. Adhesive bandages are from the New J.

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And thus, so is Nelly's iconic ~lewk~.

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16. Even ANNE HATHAWAY is from Jer-Z.

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17. Remember when she laughed at this knife? THAT'S JERSEY, BABY!

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18. We also got JACK NICHOLSON.

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No one freaks out Jennifer Lawrence quite like people from New Jersey!

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19. And lastly, but never leastly, we gave you Whitney Houston. WHITNEY.

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And, by the transitive property, the second most important Vine of all time. / Vine / Via

So don't say Jersey's good for nothin'. We've given the world tons of great things!*

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*Including Jon Stewart!!!

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